Wanting to be Wanted
by Turtle Babe
Summary: AU/Tcest fiction-What do you do when you are left behind? For me, you smile and hide the pain
1. Chapter 1

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Prologue

My world was very small when I was young. I had my father and my three older brothers. My family was different so we were not allowed to go out and make a lot of friends. I was okay with this because my world revolved around my brothers and I was happy. Time marched on and we grew. We even made friends with humans like April and Casey. My world still revolved around my brothers, but their world expanded and soon things changed. I felt them as they pulled away, but I remained silent. My brothers seemed happy as everything I once knew crumpled into dust around me. What do you do when you are left behind? For me, you smile and hide the pain.

Chapter One

I heard them again last night. They didn't think that I heard, but I did. The small gasps and moans whispered secretly through my wall. It hurt to hear them. Leo, Raph, and Donnie being together and me being alone. Alone. I sat up and looked at my alarm clock. It was too early to be up, but uncomfortable to be in my room any longer. I tiredly got out of bed and dressed for the day before padding out to the living room. I sighed as I sat on the couch. I had no clue when my brothers' relationship had slipped into lovers and mates, but I was clearly not invited.

"Stop throwing a pity party for yourself," I reprimanded the whining voice in my head even as I wrapped my arms around myself, "You are just not their type. That's all. Grow up! You are not entitled to everything your heart desires."

But that was the problem. I did desire that kind of a relationship from my bros. I wanted to feel Leo's protective arms around me, and Raph's strength, and Donnie's gentle lips. I wanted what I couldn't have and it was hurting me terribly. Silently I crept to the lair door and went for a run in the sewers. I needed to get lost in the sensations of physical exercise to clear my head of what I wanted my brothers to be doing to me.

"Give it up, Loser," I growled to myself as I pushed my body to go faster and faster, "You were born a virgin and you will die a virgin. There isn't anyone who would desire a mutant turtle like you. Be happy with the life you've got."

I ran and ran, but my heart was not happy with the life I currently had and the broken shards of what was left in my chest throbbed painfully. I ran until the sun was beginning to show through the sewer grates before I jogged silently back to the lair. The door was slammed open before I even reached for the secret handle.

"Where have you been, Mikey?" Leo demanded jerking me inside to see Donnie looking worried and Raph glaring in my direction, "We wake up and discover that you're missing and you didn't even have your phone on you."

I was a bit surprised at the anger that was radiating off of my brothers. There hadn't been any trouble from Shredder lately so things were pretty quiet these days.

"Couldn't sleep," I admitted as I panted to get my breathing under control, "Went for a jog so that I wouldn't disturb anybody's sleep. I didn't even think about my phone. My bad."

"Did ya go ta tha surface, Mike?" Raph growled as his hands tightened into fists.

"Shell, no," I assured noticing that my bros relaxed considerably, "I'm not that stupid. I ran through the sewers and then came back once the sun began to rise."

"You were up before the sun?" Donnie questioned, "That's not like you, Mikey. Is something bothering you? You've been a bit quiet for the past month or so."

I watched as my three, older brothers looked at me with concern. I knew that they loved me, but I wanted to admit to them that I wanted to be loved by them in a different way. I simply sighed and lied through my teeth.

"Nightmares," I stated, "Past battle stuff and warped endings to what actually happened. I'll get over it."

I watched as my brothers settled and seemed to have a silent conversation with their eyes. I hated seeing their connection. It hurt feeling left out.

"Don't do this again," Leo instructed as he put an arm around my shoulders, "Just…just turn on the television when you get up so early. I'll hear you and we can talk about the dream together. You really scared us."

Fat chance I'm doing that, but I'd lie again to keep my brothers happy and content.

"Thanks, Leo," I agreed, "I'm going to go take a shower. Once I'm done I'll start breakfast. How about waffles? I feel like a good waffle."

"Ya look like one too," Raph chuckled out as I stuck my tongue at him, "Go get cleaned up, Sweat Boy."

"Meany!" I griped as I stomped to the bathroom.

It felt good to hear my three brothers' amusement. At least I could still make them laugh. My happy demeanor dropped once I locked the bathroom door behind me. I turned the shower on and only then did I allow the sobs to start. It hurt to be so close to the ones you love more than anything else and yet be so damn far that you are overlooked and forgotten. I eased into the shower and allowed my hands to go lower to give myself the only bit of pleasure I would ever get in my lifetime. It helped to imagine the hands to be someone else's and I moaned until I found some completion. I scrubbed up and finished my shower.

"Great. Now I look as good as I feel," I whined to myself as I looked into the mirror and saw the dark circles and bloodshot eyes.

I dried myself up and concealed the bags beneath my eyes with my mask. Whistling a little tune, I entered the kitchen and began mixing up some waffle batter. I had just finished cooking a plate of waffles when I heard my brothers enter the kitchen playfully teasing with one another. My heart twinged and I sighed softly as I placed the breakfast on the table.

"Mikey, you look awful," Donnie stated as he caught my face between his hands which made Leo and Raph look over in concern.

"It's fine," I soothed as I pulled away while Master Splinter entered the kitchen, "You know that I had a little trouble sleeping last night. I'll grab a nap later in the day, Bro."

"Michelangelo, I was made aware of your night run," our Father interjected as I set his miso soup and tea in front of him, "I do not want you going off on your own without letting someone know about your intentions in the future."

"Hai, Sensei," I agreed as I smiled at my family to reassure them, "It won't happen again."

Raph knuckled the top of my head softly as I whined like I was supposed to. Everyone began to eat and I also took a waffle, but my appetite just wasn't there. I tuned everyone out as I picked at my food half-heartedly. I started at a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Raph looking at my unhappily.

"Ya look like shit, Mike," Raph blurted making me blush in embarrassment, "Now ya ain't eatin' one of your favorite breakfast foods. What tha shell kind of nightmare did ya have last night?"

"Wha…ah…um," I stuttered at a loss for words as I got lost in those beautiful, amber eyes that were staring at me before jumping again when Leo reached over and felt my forehead, "Leo?"

"You're a bit warm," my older brother voiced in concern as Donnie stood and began to check my pulse and feel the glands in my neck.

"Bros, I'm fine," I snickered out, "I just took a hot shower so I'm probably still heated from the water. Let it be."

"Michelangelo, you are not 'fine,'" Sensei admonished as I lowered my head dejectedly, "Even if your temperature has been affected by the shower you are clearly exhausted and need sleep. You will go straight back to your room and go back to bed. You are excused from training for the day."

"Hai, Sensei," I agreed feeling a little relieved at the prospect of getting some rest, "I'll go after I clean the kitchen."

"You'll go now," Leo disagreed as I was pulled to my feet and led towards my room, "We can clean the dishes."

I followed obediently like a dog. I was too numb and worn to fight and my bed was calling me pretty loudly. I sent Leonardo a look of exasperation as my oldest brother tucked me in my bed while he scowled at my messy room.

"It's art," I deadpanned as he sent a look my way, "I was going for 'Modern Art-Picasso.'"

Leo snorted and gave me a half smile.

"Take these pills," Donnie ordered as he handed me a glass of water and some medicine while walking into the room, "The sweat on your forehead proves that you have a low-grade fever and I don't want you to get worse."

"Yes, Doctor," I teased as Leo and Don rolled their eyes, but I swallowed the pills dutifully and lay down gratefully on my pillow.

"He asleep?" I heard Raph quietly whisper from the hallway a few minutes later.

"Yes," Donnie whispered back, "I'll go check on him after morning practice. His fever should go back to normal by then."

I vaguely felt a hand stroke the back of my head before my lights were turned off and the door quietly shut. Again, the shards of my heart pricked within me. Would this be what I was for the rest of my life? Just a baby brother to be babysat? I drifted off into an uneasy sleep, but for once I drifted into a deep rest that was not full of dreams that scared or hurt me. I enjoyed the feeling of nothingness until voices drew me from my sleep and I slowly began to return to the land of the living.

"Mikey?" Donnie's voice entered my thoughts and I hummed tiredly.

"Come on, Bro, wake up," I heard Leo encourage with a note of stress in his voice, "Open your eyes."

I grizzled grumpily and wrinkled my snout.

"Open those baby blues right now, Knucklehead," Raph growled and I slowly peeled my eye lids open and looked up fuzzily at my three brothers.

"Whazit?" I grunted before focusing on the fact that I wasn't in my room anymore and Master Splinter was also in Donnie's lab looking at me with great concern, "Huh?"

"Thank goodness," my purple-banded brother exclaimed as he sat heavily on a chair next to the bed I was lying in, "Mikey, you scared us half to death."

"What?" I asked feeling confused, but still noticing how Leo and Raph moved to lay a comforting hand on Donnie's shoulders.

"My son, you have had a very high fever for the last three days," Sensei informed me as my eyes widened in surprise and I finally noticed the IV needle in one of my arms, "We couldn't get you to rouse and you had us very worried."

I blinked in shock as I tried to process all of what I was being told. I looked up when Raph felt my forehead before smirking down at me.

"Now that's a way ta get out of trainin'," he chuckled out as Leo looked at him sourly, "That had some style, Mikey."

"Style my shell!" Leo snapped as he sat down on the bed and pulled me into a hug, "You are never to go out running in the sewers in the middle of the night _ever_ again. Donnie thinks that you chilled yourself down and your body couldn't fight the fever because you were so tired."

"I'm sorry," I murmured as I reveled in the warm arms around me and smiled when Raph and Donnie joined in on the hug, "I'm okay, Bros."

I was surprised to feel how weak I was when Leo lowered me back down on my pillow. I felt my father squeeze my hand and I looked over at Sensei and grinned.

"You are on strict bed rest," Donnie informed me before his face softened at the yawn that forced itself out of my mouth, "Go back to sleep, Mikey."

"Kay," I slurred as my eyes closed of their own accord.

I was made to stay in bed for a week and I found sleeping to be a lot easier in Donnie's lab. I wasn't forced to hear the lovers' trysts. It was easier to handle being alone every night when you didn't have to pick up on the intimate closeness my brothers could share with one another. The pain in my chest grew daily, but it was an ache that I was becoming familiar with. Finally, Donnie allowed me to rest on the couch and I became happily involved in silly, reality shows that showed very little actual life.

"Good ta hear that laugh again," Raph grinned out as he walked in with Leo and Donnie after morning practice.

"Glad I could entertain," I chuckled as I shifted to look at my brothers, "Even I can call this stuff crap. It's ridiculous."

"Ha!" Donnie giggled as he plopped down and leaned against me, "I will remind you of those very words when you force me through one of your Horror Fests. Now those movies are ridiculous."

"Don't attack the classics, Dude," I whined as I enjoyed the feel of one of my crush's skin against my own, "You just don't appreciate real works of cinematic art."

Inside I felt like I died a little more. I was back to being the baby brother again.

"Art like your room?" Leo inquired with a smirk.

"Bah," I growled playfully.

I had a quiet afternoon of bickering and talking with my brothers. If this was all I ever was going to get from them, then I would enjoy what I was allowed to have. I guess beggars can't be choosers. By the next week, I was recovered enough to attend training again, but Master Splinter didn't want me to overexert myself so I was only allowed to stretch and perform a few katas. I sat out of the sparring and was told to meditate instead, but clearing my mind was difficult as I watch the movement of Leo's and Raph's muscles as they fought during afternoon training.

"Stop ogling," I warned myself as I looked away and closed my eyes, "Leo and Raph belong to Donnie."

I felt a presence hover near me and looked up only to freeze.

"Mikey?" Donnie said to me as I looked up at his kneeling form in surprise while he felt my forehead, "Your face is red. Do you feel okay?"

I blinked at him and then noticed that Leo and Raph were hurrying over after noticing what was going on.

"Is the fever back?" Leo demanded as he squatted down next to Donnie and I.

"No," Donnie denied, "His temperature is normal."

"Good gravy, Miss Daisy," I giggled out at my shocked older brothers, "I was just remembering a time when I really sucked at meditating and Raph teased me horrible. I guess I was blushing at the memory."

"I remember that," Raph cracked as he grinned, "Ya farted on Sensei."

"Yes, Raph," I groaned as I blushed darker, "I remember. Worse day of my life!"

"Leave him alone," Leo chuckled as he spun my mask around so I couldn't see, "Get back to meditating, Mike, and try to clear your mind this time."

"And not ya gas," I heard Raph laugh.

I fixed my mask back in place and finally was able to clear my mind and slip into a deep meditation. I blinked out of the trance later and saw that the dojo was empty except for Leo who was sitting lotus position in front of me.

"Leo?" I asked.

"That was a pretty impressive display of meditation skills," my older brother complimented me before frowning slightly, "Mikey, you went into a pretty, deep trance there and meditated for over two hours. I was just about to enter your mind and help guide you back."

"I wasn't lost," I denied feeling panic if one of my brothers ever did enter my mind, "It was just so…peaceful. I kinda understand why you and Sensei like to meditate so much."

Leo took my breath away when he gave me one of his rare, unguarded smiles. My heart throbbed as the love for my brother oozed up within me. I felt like such a cheesy, school girl.

"You could join Sensei and I during our meditation sessions sometime," he offered making me smile back to him.

"I'd like that," I agreed as Leo helped me stand before jumping when Raph came barging into the room.

"Knucklehead, ya've been hoggin' Leo long enough," my hotheaded brother crabbed as he swiped at me playfully, "Don needs ta see him out in tha garage."

"That was code for "we're going to have sex in one of the vehicles." Great! Life just keeps getting better and better.

"Okie-dokie," I chirped as I walked to the kitchen, "I'll start getting dinner started."

Leo and Raph halted and looked back at me.

"Are you sure that you feel up to cooking?" Leo asked.

"Good, Lord," I groaned rolling my eyes, "I had a fever not a life ending injury. I'm not made of glass, Bro. I am the Battle Nexus Champion, you know?"

"Yeah. Yeah," Raph chortled, "I want lasagna, Champ."

"Sounds good," I agreed and watched as they disappeared through the door with an eager bounce in their step before I leaned against a wall and rubbed at the ache in my breast, "Have fun."

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 2

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Two

I grimaced and had to breathe deeply as the pain in my chest throbbed for several long moments. I looked up at the ceiling and sighed as I imagined my brothers twined together within their own little world.

"What is it like to be loved as fully as that?" I questioned before leaning up and looking towards the garage, "Be happy, Bros. I'm happy for you."

Walking to the kitchen, I sighed once again. I was happy for my brothers, but being with them was still a dream that I couldn't let go of. Not yet. I cursed softly when I realized that the "cupboards were bare" within the kitchen.

"What the shell has everyone been eating?" I wondered as I scribbled out a quick note and grabbed my phone and some household monies.

I walked from the lair briskly as I dialed Casey's number.

"Mikey?" Casey asked as he answered the call, "What's up, Bro? Ya feelin' bettah?"

"Hey, Case," I greeted, "Yes, I'm fine. Can you do me a favor and get some groceries for me? There is nothing left in the lair. I think my bros have been sucking on spaghetti noodles to get by."

I smiled as I heard my friend roar in laughter. I gave him my list and agreed to meet him on his roof to repay him and collect the groceries. I exited the sewers to see that it wasn't quite dark, but dark enough. Keeping to the shadows, I hopped up a fire escape to reach Casey's roof. I waited patiently for an hour and jumped at the ringing of my phone.

"Where the _shell_ are you?" Leo blasted into my eardrum.

"Dude, chill," I soothed, "I left a note saying I was getting Casey to get some groceries. There was nothing to cook."

"Where _are_ you?" my older brother snapped as I heard him running with what sounded like my other two brothers.

"I'm on Casey's roof," I answered and then halted when the door of the roof swung open, "Casey's here now."

"Stay there and don't go anywhere," Leo hissed and hung up on me.

Rude! I greeted Casey and gave him the money to cover the grocery bill. We chatted for all of two minutes when Casey's phone rang. I had to cover my mouth with a fist when Casey had to hold his phone a foot away from his ear as Raph tore him a new one.

"Dude, chill," Casey groaned as I rolled my eyes at him as he was finally able to get a word in edgewise, "Mike is right here. No. He looks fine. I'll ask. Mikey, did you encounter any Foot or criminals that took advantage of you having just been ill?"

"Nope," I giggled out as I snatched the phone from Casey, "Raph, why are you angry at Casey? You know that we can get to the fire escape from the alleyway that holds the manhole we use in like ten seconds flat."

"Not tha point, Shell-Brain," my brother growled, "Ya ain't up ta ya usual performance levels. It was too much of a risk for ya ta be up top. Leo and Donnie are practically havin' a panic attack here. Stay with Casey. Put him back on tha phone."

I handed Casey his phone back with an apologetic look. The human grinned at me before putting the phone back to his ear and nodding like Raph was going to hear his brain shaking around in his noggin.

"Got it," Casey sighed out as he rolled his eyes at me, "I ain't goin' nowheres. See ya, Raph. Ya in so much trouble, Mike-ster."

"They'll get over it," I sighed as I pulled my knees up to my chest, "They should have stocked the kitchen. Bros are being overly protective again."

"Ya their baby bro," Casey scolded gently as he sat beside me, "They are always going ta protect ya until ya all old and grey. That's what big brothers do."

"Mmhm," I hummed as Casey and I sat quietly until three turtle-shaped shadows hopped up on the darkened roof a minute later, "Hey, Guys."

"Put this on," Donnie insisted as he marched up and handed me a large, black hoodie, "You should not be out in the cold, night air."

I slipped into the hoodie and emerged from the neck to see Leo glaring angrily at me.

"No more topside until Sensei gives you permission, Michelangelo," my oldest brother gritted out and used my full name which meant he was upset and stressed.

"Got it," I easily agreed, "Didn't think that grocery shopping would be that big of a problem. Sorry I scared you."

I looked over and saw Casey and Raph having a quiet conversation. Raph caught my eye and glared which made me duck my head sheepishly. His face instantly softened and he walked over with the bags of groceries.

"We ready ta bolt?" Raph inquired as I stood up.

"Yes," Leo agreed before looking over at Casey, "Thanks for your help and staying with Mikey."

"No prob," Casey drawled, "Keep yaselves safe."

My bros and I went on silent mode until we were safely in the sewers. I flinched when Leo whirled on me.

"Never do that again!" Leo snapped looking livid, "If the Foot had been out there you would have been trounced!"

"Okay," I breathed feeling worn and tired all of a sudden, "It will never happen again."

Donnie walked up and put his arm around my shoulders looking concerned. I shot him an apologetic look and leaned against him a moment before taking his hand and tugging him in the direction of the lair. The four of us traveled silently and I felt all the looks thrown in my direction, but I choose to ignore them. Leo stopped me at the lair's door looking contrite.

"I'm sorry that I yelled at you," he began, but I waved to silence him.

"No. It's cool, Dude," I denied, "I didn't think this through very well. I really am sorry to have scared you three."

My brothers smiled in relief and nodded to show that they accepted my apology. We entered the lair and Raph helped me put the groceries away in the kitchen.

"Ya look tired," my red-banded brother observed.

"A little," I admitted.

"How about we do that lasagna tomorrow and ya go get some rest?" Raph suggested, "We'll grab a pizza tonight."

"That sounds like a plan," Donnie called from the doorway where he and Leo were hovering.

I nodded and cracked a classic "Mikey" smile before walking to the stairs. Their voices stopped me in my tracks.

"We've got ta be more careful," Raph whispered even though I was able to pick up on his voice through my training, "If we hadn't been havin' a little fun in tha garage we would have had a better eye on tha Knucklehead."

"My fault," Donnie moaned softly, "We've just have so little time together since Mikey got sick that I was getting a little needy."

A knife felt like it was cutting into my heart. Now I was interfering with the lovers' relationship? Shell! Shell! _Shell_!

"We like you needy," Leo purred as I heard Donnie gasp softly before I swiftly fled up the stairs to my room with no noise at all to my footsteps.

"Why can't you love me too?" my mind wailed as tears filled my eyes, "Why am I the only one that has to be alone?"

I reeled my thoughts in with an effort. It was unfair of me to think bad of my brothers. The heart decides for itself who it loves. There was something about me that wasn't "lover" material for my bros. I lay down on my bed and allowed the tears to flow. I had to let the pain of rejection out somehow. That way I wouldn't interfere in my brothers' relationship more than I already had. I must have fallen asleep because I woke to familiar hands rubbing my shell. It felt good.

"Donnie?" I asked as I looked up at him in confusion.

"You were crying," my brother informed me, "I came into to check on you and I found the tears on your cheeks. What's wrong, Mikey? Did we hurt your feelings today?"

"Shell no," I gasped sitting up, "I must have been having a dream. I wasn't crying when I fell asleep. I swear."

Donnie studied me carefully, but I kept the most innocent "I don't understand" look on my face as I stared at him wide-eyed. And the Oscar goes to….

"We need to start talking about your nightmares more," Donnie finally stated, "I think the dreams are causing you to not get proper sleep and I don't want another episode like that fever to occur. I want you to drink some of Sensei's tea that helps one relax tonight."

"Ew," I grimaced, "The one that taste like what feet smell like and makes me think that Leo has bunny ears?"

It was music to my ears when Donnie threw his head back and laughed joyously. This was my treasure. I could still make my brothers laugh.

"Maybe, I'll just start you off with chamomile tea," Donnie giggled as I smiled softly.

"What is so funny?" Leo asked from the doorway as he and Raph peeked into my room.

"Donnie wanted to make me drink Sensei's special tea," I announced which made Raph snort in laughter as memories of the last time I drank that tea filled his mind.

"No, Donnie," Leo shuddered out, "It took me hours to convince Mikey that I didn't have blue, bunny ears on my head last time and I wasn't very happy that he kept checking my rear for a bunny tail. Why does Mikey need something to aid his sleep anyway?"

"No reason," I quickly asserted, but cowed when Donnie looked at me.

"Leo is our leader," my brother informed me, "He needs to be on 'the know' about everything so when he is making decision he is able to do so with all known variables."

I sighed and nodded as Leo came fully into the room and sat at the end of my bed.

"What is going on that I don't know about?" Leo questioned while Raph leaned in my doorframe looking concerned.

"Mikey doesn't remember that he was crying in his sleep," Donnie explained making Leo and Raph sit up straighter, "His dreams are getting a little too intense and I want to see if I can assist him in reaching past the REM level so he can forgo the dreams altogether."

"Lord," I wailed as I fell face down into my pillow as my brothers gasped around me, "I'm going to die from embarrassment!"

My cry was met with chuckles from my brothers.

"Shut up," I groaned into my pillow, "I'm the only ninja in the world that can be taken out by first a fever and now a silly dream."

"Drama queen," Raph laughed as I sat up and glared at the room in general, "We've all been laid up by sickness before. Plus, even I've taken a swig of chamomile tea ta settle myself down when I couldn't sleep. Nothin' ta be ashamed of."

"Fine," I agreed as I allowed Donnie to tug me down to eat pizza, "But no teasing or I really will drink Sensei's special tea."

"Heavens, no," Leo begged as we laughed at his stricken expression.

Time passed and I did as Donnie wanted me to and hid my feelings. I was finally deemed well enough to fully join the trainings and patrols again. I was able to get some sleep by using headphones to block out any of the mating noises coming from one of my brother's rooms. Sometimes I went and slept out on the couch.

My brothers' continued with their special relationship and I continued to play the role of little brother. It was a role that allowed me to help my brothers relax and laugh, but it was also a role that was chipping away at my very soul. I think that Master Splinter was beginning to suspect something and I was not surprised to feel him trying to enter my mind during each meditation session, but I had been developing my skills and was able to keep him at a distance.

"I cannot be the turtle that reveals my brothers' secret," I thought to myself, "I can do this much for my bros. I can protect their love for one another just in case Father does not understand."

I hid my feelings of abandonment as I started seeing less and less of my brothers during our free-times. I did what was expected out of me. I watched television, played videogames, joked, cooked, and simply died inside whenever I noticed a hidden gesture of love between my brothers. It grew hard to breathe at times, but I pushed through the pain.

"Michelangelo," Master Splinter called to me after one particularly vigorous training, "My son, I would like to speak with you."

I nodded as my brothers looked between Sensei and I curiously. I shrugged my shoulders at them and went to kneel in front of Master Splinter as my older siblings left the dojo.

"My son, I sense that there is something that is causing you strife," my Father began as he looked calm, but concerned, "Your brothers have been too busy to notice, but I can see that something is weighing on your mind."

Crap! Crap! Lies wouldn't work on Master Splinter.

"I've just been having some issues sleeping," I tried as Sensei looked at me doubtfully, "Everything is fine, Father. I've just been trying to work some stuff out in my head. It's a personal issue that I need to keep private."

"I can always lend a sympathetic ear and assist you with your thought processes if you would like," Sensei offered.

"I really appreciate that you want to help," I acknowledged, "But this is something I need to work out myself. I can't always turn to you and my brothers for everything all the time. I've got to learn to stand on my own two feet."

"That is a good lesson to learn when one is growing up," my father agreed as he smiled at me, "Just know that sometimes it is okay to rely on others."

"Hai, Sensei," I chirped as I fell back into the baby of the family role.

I left the dojo to go take a shower, but was pounced on by Leo and Donnie. The two tried to get out of me what Sensei wanted to speak with me about, but I was able to convince my brothers that it was a private matter and they let the topic drop.

Months passed and things stayed the same with me, but I noticed that Raph was calmer and Leo was easier going. Donnie seemed more content than he had ever been before. I loved that they were happy, but I hated the permanent pain that throbbed in my chest. I tried to play my role well, but the strain of keeping everything together was making me tense and irritable. My mask was beginning to crack.

"What tha hell is your problem?" Raph finally demanded one day when Master Splinter had left so that we could spar.

"What are you talking about?" I snapped back at him as we circled one another.

"What bug crawled up your ass, Mikey?" my brother growled as Leo and Donnie stopped their sparring to listen, "Ya've been a real devil ta live with lately. What happened ta my goofy, little brother?"

"Oh, for God's sake," I gritted out as anger welled up in me and I stepped up in my brother's face, "Why the shell do I always have to be the damn 'goofy, little brother?' When can I just be Mikey?"

"What?" Raph inquired as he took a step back and stared at me in shock, "I didn't mean nothin' by…."

"Shut up!" I growled.

"Mikey…," Leo began but I spun and lanced him with my gaze.

"I'm sorry that I'm not jumping through all your hoops and being the brother you think I should be," I hissed, "But have any of you ever asked me how I want to be? Or have you three told me how to react and respond my whole goddamn life?"

My three brothers stared at me in open-mouthed astonishment.

"Why the shell can't I ever have a bad day?!" I yelled, "Raph can go off like a volcano, Leo can get all broody, and Donnie is allowed to get all snappy and lock himself in his lab, but me…I have to be a good dog and roll over and play fetch! Well, I am not your _pet_ and I will _not_ act like your damn puppet!"

"Mikey, wait," Donnie called as he hurried after me as I stomped out of the dojo.

"Leave me alone," I whispered looking over my shoulder, "I've been perfectly fine fending for myself for almost six months while you, Leo, and Raph have been busy with whatever. I don't see that it is unreasonable that I have begun to enjoy being on my own."

Donnie's eyes filled with tears and he grunted like I had hit him. Leo and Raph looked at me with mixed emotions of horror and anger. They were reacting to me having upset one of their mates. I whirled and stomped up to my room and locked the door. The tears swarmed as I slid down to the floor. I knew what was happening right now down in the dojo. Leo and Raph were comforting Donnie while I would never feel that same type of loving support from a mate. My heart hurt so bad I was left gasping in pain for a minute.

"Let it go!" I snapped at myself as I rocked to try and ease the discomfort in my chest, "You are not their mate and you will never be a part of their life like that. Stop allowing yourself to feel the pain. You have to be happy with what you have."

To be continued…


	3. Chapter 3

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Three

I rocked gently as I sat on the floor of my room. I had been chanting to myself to let go of these feelings for my brothers, but I loved them too much and couldn't do it.

"Dammit," I whined to myself as I leaned back against my door.

"Mikey?" Leo called as he knocked softly on my door which made me jump, "Little Brother, we need to talk about your outburst."

I remained silent and wasn't surprised when my older brother tried to turn the doorknob. I just hoped that he wasn't planning on picking the lock.

"Mikey, unlock this door," Leo continued, "Look. You're right. We have been kind of pigeon holing you into acting and being a certain way. I never realized that this was occurring to you. Please open the door so we can talk."

I shoved a fist into my mouth so that he wouldn't hear the sobs that were beginning to pour from my mouth. It hurt. This was just like my life. I was separated from the ones I loved by a barrier that I couldn't get through just like Leo was separated from me.

"Mikey?" Donnie called, "Baby Bro, open the door. You're right about everything. You and I used to talk all the time and I haven't even been around for you. Open the door so we can talk. Let's make things right between us again."

I curled my knees to my chest at my bro's gentle voice. Not his fault that I'm a cry baby.

"Open this door, Michelangelo," Leo ordered as he tried the knob again.

"Go away, Leo," I sniffled out, "I…I just need to be by myself right now."

"He's cryin'," I heard Raph sigh, "Damn, I made tha kid cry. That wasn't my intentions."

I froze and stood stiffly from the floor. I slammed my door open to see my three brothers start in surprise.

"I am _not_ a kid," I whispered angrily before my voices continued rising, "I have not been a kid for a long time. Stop trying to make me out to be something I'm not. I can make my own decisions. I can decide my own path in life. Those are freedoms that I have as much right to exercise as you three! I am an equal member to you in this clan and if you have decided otherwise then let me know, because that is the day that I will leave this clan and never look _back_!"

I slammed my door and locked it again even as my brothers continued to shout and bang on the door. If I couldn't have my beloved brothers' romantic love then I wanted to at least have their respect. I stayed in my room silent and unmoving on my bed for a full day. By the second day, I was beginning to get lightheaded from hunger. I started in surprise when Raph kicked my door in and stared coldly down at me.

"Get ya ass up," he ordered me as I blinked at him blankly, "Get up, Mikey! Get downstairs and eat somethin' and then get ta afternoon trainin'."

I stood and followed my livid brother down the stairs. Leo and Donnie looked at me hard as I pass by them in the living room. Great. Everyone was angry at me because I simply wanted to be treated like an equal. I sighed and went and made a sandwich. The food tasted like cardboard in my mouth and I ended up throwing most of it away.

"Michelangelo, it is time for training," Master Splinter informed me and I stood to walk to the dojo quietly.

Father walked beside me and stopped me by placing his hand on my shoulder

"My son, I heard the conversation you had with your brothers," Sensei began, "I knew one day you would have to stand up to your older siblings to fight to be seen as an equal in their eyes."

"Why, Sensei?" I asked looking away, "Am I so immature that I will never be seen as an adult by my brothers?"

"No, my son," Master Splinter denied, "You are the baby of the family and your brothers need time to see that you have grown into a formidable warrior such as they. It is hard to allow someone you love to step out from your protection."

My heart twinged at the word "love."

"Give your brothers some more time to understand your needs," Father advised, "They will come around and see that what you are requesting is your given right. If not, I will knock some sense into them because I'll be damned if my baby leaves the clan."

I choked as Master Splinter gave me a half smile.

"What?" Sensei inquired with a twinkle in his eyes, "I'm your father. You are all my babies to me."

I smiled softly at Master Splinter as he stroked my cheek and we entered the dojo together. The training went as well as expected and instead of sparing we all meditated. I enjoyed the feeling of peace as I allowed all the tension to drain from my mind and body. It felt good and I wasn't happy when something disturbed my peace.

"Mikey!" Leo's astral projection called as he pressed his hands against the shield I had over my mind, "Mikey, wake up. You've been in a trance for _three_ hours. You're in too deep. Let me in so that I can guide you back."

"Stay out of my mind," I sighed as I stood and pressed my hands against the shield where Leo's hands were positioned, "I'm fine. I just really needed to gain some peace and center myself. Have I really been meditating for three hours?"

"Yes! We are all worried about you, Little Brother," Leo informed me looking so sad, "Donnie panicked when we couldn't get you to rouse."

I could feel Leo's worry oozing through the shield in my mind.

"I didn't mean to worry anyone," I whispered looking down.

"Mikey, you are our brother. Family will always worry for family," Leo continued, "Please know that we love and adore you. We never meant to show you any disrespect and it would kill us if you left the clan because of our mistakes."

I sighed as I slid down to sit beside my shield. Leo kneeled down and watched me anxiously.

"Look. I'm just having some growing pains," I admitted as I looked up at my brother, "I've been feeling stuck in a rut for a long time and as much as I love being Donnie's, Raph's, and your baby brother, I have not been a baby in so long. I've watched you three grow and change while I was expected to stay the same all the time. I'm not the same as I once was. You guys are making it hard to be able to breathe."

"We're stifling you," Leo groaned, "I'm so sorry, Bro. I guess with how things keep changing we enjoyed having a reminder of how things used to be. You have always been the reminder of when we had simpler and more innocent times."

"You calling me simple and innocent?" I drily asked as Leo chuckled.

"To a point," my older brother agreed, "Mikey, you see the world through eyes that look for the good in everything you see. You have never allowed life to jade your happiness and it has been scary to see the light within you seem to dim these past few weeks."

"I haven't dimmed," I explained as Leo looked at me fully, "I've just grown a little more. I'll always be who I am, but that doesn't mean that I can always be happy. I get angry and sad too."

"I'm sorry, Bro," Leo offered looking contrite, "You are not a one dimensional individual and we all should have known that."

I shook my head and stood up as Leo rose as well.

"I don't blame you three for being the best, big brothers a turtle could have. Just give me some space and respect," I sighed as I eased effortlessly through the shield in my mind and allowed Leo to wrap an arm around my shoulders, "Let's go back. I'm sure that Raph and Donnie are worried just like you said."

Leo nodded looking relieved and the two of us awoke at the same time to see our other two brothers looking anxious.

"Hi," I greeted them as I stretched my legs out.

"Hello," Donnie answered before throwing his arms around me, "You have got to stop with this not waking thing you've been doing this year. It's terrifying."

"It's okay, Donnie," I soothed as Raph sat heavily beside me and pulled me into another hug after his mate had let me go, "Sorry I scared you, Raph."

"I wasn't scared," Raph denied standing as I smiled, "I was bothered by tha drama of tha whole thin'. Lockin' yaself in ya room and talkin' about leavin' tha clan. Makin' me nearly break my toe ta kick your door open. Donnie ya goin' ta have ta repair that now. Then ya sit down and meditate yaself inta a statue. Drama, I tell ya, drama."

The rest of us chuckled as Raph blushed and turned away grumpily. I stood from the floor and swayed and came near to falling over

"Whoa!" I breathed as Raph whirled and latched onto me to keep from collapsing, "My legs feel like jell-o. Dudes, I must have sat still too long."

"No, I think you need to eat," Donnie fussed as he checked my pupils and felt my pulse, "I saw you throw that sandwich you made away before practice. Did you have any snacks with you when you were locked in your room?"

I shook my head and my older brothers frowned and silently led me into the kitchen and forced me down at the table. Raph stayed by my side as Donnie began to make some food and Leo went into the fridge.

"Drink this," Leo ordered as he handed me a bottle of water, "Drink it slowly."

I nodded and sipped at the cool liquid. I didn't realize how thirsty I really was until then. Raph's hand slowed down my drinking by pulling the bottle from my lips every few seconds. Donnie made me some soup and reheated some pizza. I looked at the food and attacked.

"Geez, Mikey," Donnie chuckled as I devoured everything in sight, "Chew, don't inhale. You are acting like you haven't eaten in a week."

"Ah shday ish ah weisked fer meh en misking merils," I garbled out with a mouth full of deliciously re-heated pizza.

"Um…and that means what exactly?" Leo asked as he eyed me with amusement.

"Knucklehead said that 'a day is a week for him in missing meals,'" Raph answered for me before frowning when Leo and Don looked at him in amazement, "This is not the first time I've heard this one talk with his mouth full. I've become disgustingly fluent at full-mouth-ese."

I grinned at my hotheaded brother before politely asking for some more soup and pizza. Leo explained to Raph and Donnie what I had told him while he was in my mind. I was a bit embarrassed when all three apologized to me looking so upset and I reassured them that all was forgiven. I hated the feeling that I was still not telling my brothers the full truth, but I could never tell them that secret.

"I know what they would do," I thought to myself as I finished my second helping, "Leo would start feeling guilty and Donnie would be right there with him. Raph would get all gruff and then he would start a fight because he would start lashing out and I would ruin the beautiful relationship between my bros. Suck it up and let it go."

I flinched when my heart panged especially hard and didn't notice that I had begun to rub at my chest.

"That's it!" Donnie growled and I found myself yanked out of my chair and marched into his lab with a surprised Leo and Raph following behind us.

"What?" I asked in confusion as I was literally thrown on his examination table.

"I have seen you flinch like that one too many times," Donnie snapped as he grabbed his stethoscope, "I thought at first you had a pulled muscle, but you have begun rubbing or touching your chest a lot lately. I want the truth. Are you having heart and chest pains?"

I blinked feeling panicked. I hadn't even realized that I had been physically responding to my broken heart.

"I'm fine," I reassured, "It's just gas."

"How long have you noticed Mikey doing this?" Leo demanded as he ignored me.

"About a month. Deep breath in, Mikey," Donnie stated as he placed the cold diaphragm between my skin and plastron and listened for a few seconds, "Deep breath out, Mikey."

Donnie had me breathe several times in and out as he moved the stethoscope around and even stuck the damn thing down the back of my shell to listen.

"Well?" Raph demanded as I sighed softly knowing that I wasn't going to get a word in edgewise.

"Heart sounds good," Donnie said looking deep in thought before turning to me, "You are going to cooperate and answer some questions and do some tests for me."

"I'm fine," I whined irritably.

"Do as Donnie asks of you," Leo said in his leader voice and I groaned as I nodded.

The next few hours I was poked and prodded. I answered every question as honestly as I could allow myself and ended up running on a treadmill hooked up to a machine to measure my heart rate. At the end I was given a clean bill of health.

"I told you," I pouted as I thumped down on the couch and glared at Donnie, "It was gas."

"I'm not going to take the chance that it could have been more serious than that," the Genius interjected, "I won't apologize for caring about the health of my baby brother even if he really _is_ old enough to care for himself."

I relaxed at Donnie's words and allowed him to pull me in a hug. I hugged back, but the shards of my heart pricked dreadfully and I had to hide a wince of pain.

"I'm tired," I said as I pulled away and stood up, "I'm going to bed. Goodnight Donnie. Nightie-night, Leo and Raph."

My brothers looked torn as I scurried up the steps. I rounded the corner and leaned against the wall to allow my heart to stop throbbing.

"Did ya see that?" Raph asked making me listen, "Mike looked like he was hurtin'.

"I saw it too," Leo's quiet voice carried up to me, "Donnie, when you hugged Mikey a look of pain crossed his face."

"I've been noticing that happening quite a bit," Donnie groaned, "There is something wrong, but all of the tests show that Mikey is in better shape than the rest of us. I don't understand what's going on and I'm feeling beyond frustrated."

Damn. I was going to have to learn to control my facial expressions better. I couldn't allow my brothers to notice anything again.

"Has he not confided in ya at all, Don?" I heard Raph's ask, "Tha Knucklehead used ta tell ya everythin'."

"Your right," Donnie whispered sounding tearful, "Mikey used to tell me everything, but he doesn't anymore. He is my best friend and now I feel like I'm being pushed away. There is a wall that I can't seem to get through and that is not like our brother."

"Mikey said he is going through some growing pains," Leo soothed, "Maybe he just needs some time to figure himself out. We have been smothering him and maybe he just wants some alone time and the flinches of pain are his conflicted feelings. I know he would never do anything intentional to hurt any of us. We'll just observe him for right now, but if this continues we are going to talk to Father. Maybe he can get Mikey to open up to him."

Tears pricked at my eyes as I dragged myself silently to my room. I would never do anything to hurt my brothers and neither would they, but they _had_ hurt me and they didn't know it. They had formed a team that made me the odd turtle out and it was beginning to wear me down.

I fell into a fitful sleep that was abruptly interrupted by the shrieking of the security system in the wee hours of the morning. I was up and out of my room with weapons drawn. My room was the closest to the stairs and I peeked around the corner to gauge the enemy and froze in shock.

"Hello, Little One," the figure said as he looked down on me with amused, hazel eyes.

To be continued…


	4. Chapter 4

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Four

I fell into a fitful sleep that was abruptly interrupted by the shrieking of the security system in the wee hours of the morning. I was up and out of my room with weapons drawn. My room was the closest to the stairs and I peeked around the corner to gauge the enemy and froze in shock.

"Hello, Little One," the figure said as he looked down on me with amused, hazel eyes.

"Um…Leo?" I asked before a hand snatched my wrist urgently and I was pulled back behind a familiar shell.

"That sure as shell ain't Leo!" Raph growled with his weapons raised as the Leo I knew leapt from the hallway with swords drawn, "Fearless, we got a copycat here."

The amused turtle was dressed in an all-black outfit that covered his whole body except for his shell and head. There was a blue belt around his waist and two swords strapped to his back, but his face was bare and smiling. I stared in wonder to see that this Leo was several years older than mine.

"A copy in more ways than one," the other Leo chuckled out as he crossed his arms over his chest while Donnie and I looked over our brothers' shoulders in shock, "Sorry to disturb you at such an ungodly hour, but we need to talk."

"Who are you?" Leo demanded as he kept his weapons raised, "How did you find our lair?"

"We found ya easily because technically we live here too," a gruff voice called from down in the living room.

Donnie and I looked at one another and then over the railing. There sat another Raph and Donnie dressed similarly to the other Leo with their customary weapons and colored belts that matched my brothers' masks. I looked, but there didn't seem to be another me. The other Leo walked down the steps as Master Splinter exited his room and gazed at everybody calmly. All of us were surprised when the other two turtles stood and all three bowed respectfully to our sensei.

"Greetings, Master Splinter," the other Leo smiled out, "My brothers and I mean your family no harm. We are from a different dimension and we have come to request your assistance. We did not mean to set off your alarms. They are different from the ones we have set up for our lair. My apologies for the disturbance."

"Welcome to our home," Sensei responded as he bowed to the other turtles, "Please sit and we can discuss what has brought you here."

My Leo sheathed his weapons and stared down at the newcomers before making his way slowly down the stairs with a cautious expression on his face. Raph followed, but he kept an arm out blocking Donnie or I from getting around him. I heard my purple-banded brother beginning to fuss, but my eyes were locked on the other turtles that were staring right back at me in wonder.

"What tha _shell_ are ya starin' at?" my Raph gritted out as he pulled me completely behind him, "Stop ooglin' our baby brother if ya want ta keep your eyes intact."

"Forgive us," the other Donnie soothed, "We are simply amazed that in this realm there is a fourth turtle."

My brothers tensed as I sped around my Raph to plop on the couch next to the other Leo.

"You mean that there isn't a _me_ in your world?" I asked in surprise as my eyes widened.

"No, Little One," the other Leo answered as he and the others continued to stare at me in curiosity, "We have always been a family of three brothers. Nat has been our baby brother and here it seems you are the youngest. What is your name?"

"I'm Michelangelo," I chirped, "But most people call me 'Mikey.' I know your names. At least I guess they are the same as my brothers, but I'm not sure that calling you by the same names will be a good idea since we'll all get really confused. I mean, how weird would it be to call out 'Leo' and have two turtles respond, huh?"

The older turtles chuckled as they exchanged grins with one another before looking back at me.

"Mikey has a point," Leo stated as he came and purposely sat between the other Leo and myself as Donnie came and to sit on the couch arm right beside me and placed an arm around my shoulders, "What are your names?"

I was a bit surprised that my brothers seemed to not be excited that there were others like us sitting here in our living room. In fact, Leo, Raph, and Donnie were being down right standoffish.

"I am Leonardo, but my brothers call me 'Leon,'" the other Leo introduced himself before gesturing to his brothers, "This is my second brother Raphael, but he goes by the name 'Ray' and our youngest is Donatello or 'Nat.' Our father was also called Splinter, but he passed away peacefully in his sleep several years ago."

"I'm sorry for your loss," I offered feeling very sad at the thought of losing Father.

"Your empathy over our loss is a testament to your kind spirit," Nat softly spoke as he and his brothers continued to look at me as if I wasn't real or something, "Thank you for your words of comfort."

"Why are ya here?" Raph demanded with a scowl as he stood behind Donnie, "I ain't tryin' ta be rude, but ya must have somethin' ya want out of us besides starin' up our baby brother like a bunch of stalkers."

I blinked in surprise at Raph's words and heard Sensei fussing at my hotheaded brother's lack of manners.

"Told you, Ray," Nat cheerfully grinned out as his brother glared at him, "You are a dick in any universe."

"Hey!" Raph and Ray snapped as one and I couldn't help but laugh good and hard.

"If Ray and Raph were the same age they could be twins," I pointed out, "This is so cool."

I bounced up out of my seat and circled Ray to look at him better. The older turtle looked back at me with amusement.

"Raph, you are going to get taller," I exclaimed as I pointed at my brother's doppelganger, "Ray's so big. I feel like a munchkin. Look!"

I stood side by side and showed my family how much shorter I was to the new arrival. Raph nodded tersely at me and gently pulled me against his side and away from Ray.

"I see that you are just as protective over your baby as we are of ours," Leon stated as he gestured to Nat, who rolled his eyes and winked at me, "We truly mean no harm to any of you."

"Why don't you tell us why you need our assistance?" Master Splinter inquired.

"There is an arms dealer from our world that found a dimensional portal ta get here," Ray began as he scowled angrily, "Tha man is a sleaze and Nat was able ta hack inta his files ta see that he is tryin' ta buy some kind of weapon from your Shredder."

"Our world is very limited in its resources," Leon continued, "This weapon would wipe out the last of our water supply and our world would perish. Nat discovered the fact that you were here in this world so we came to ask your help in stopping Shredder from selling this weapon to Maxus. We didn't know where to look for you, but chanced the hope that your lair was in the same place that our lair stands in our New York City. We got lucky."

"Leo, we have to help them," Donnie urged, "It is upsetting to hear that Shredder has a weapon that can make such an impact. We've got to destroy it at all costs."

"I agree," Leo admitted before scrutinizing the three, older turtle, "Do you know when this Maxus is to meet Shredder?"

"Yes," Nat agreed, "He has an appointment to meet Shredder at a shipping yard two days from now at midnight."

"The details of a plan can be determined later," Master Splinter instructed, "It is 3:00 in the morning and I for one need more sleep. Leon you will share Leonardo's room for right now and Nat you will go with Donatello. Mikey show Ray to your room."

"What?" Raph squawked, "Ray can bunk with me."

"To share your hammock?" Father drily asked as Donnie and Leo looked mutinous.

I realized that my brothers didn't want me left alone with basically strangers. They had been the same way with April and Casey at first.

"I'll stay with Leo," I insisted, "My bed is huge and can be shared. That way Ray and Leon won't have to sleep on a futon on the floor. They are basically like our cousins or something. It would be rude to make them sleep on the floor. Plus, I have that bunk bed that Nat can take."

My brothers physically relaxed at my suggestion and the newcomers nodded at the suggestion and smile.

"Follow me," I chirped as I led the older versions of my brothers to my room before getting a look at the mess and blushing, "Oops. My place is a bit of a mess. Sorry."

"No prob, Kid," Ray assured, "It ain't too bad. I appreciate ya givin' up ya room for us."

"It's okay," I grinned as I cleaned off all of my clutter on the bunk bed for Nat, "We're cousins now so that makes you family. Do you want me to get some fresh bedding?"

"This is fine, Little One," Leon admitted as he surprised me by stroking one of my cheeks and cocking my head up as he looked into my eyes, "You have the most lovely, blue eyes."

"I agree, Brother," Nat interjected as he looked down at me from the bunk.

"His eyes are unique," Leo interrupted from the doorway with Raph standing stiffly behind him, "Sleep well. Let's _go_, Mikey."

I waved as I followed my older brother to his room. I crawled into bed and was drifting off when I heard a soft knock at Leo's door.

"Donnie, what are you and Raph doing in here?" Leo whispered, "Mikey's sleeping."

"Did I see that Fearless-wannabe touchin' our Mike?" Raph hissed angrily.

"Yes," Leo muttered irritably.

"Maybe they are just curious," Donnie offered, "They just met Mikey and he is so friendly that he draws others in without even being conscious of what he is doing."

"Leon was strokin' our baby brother's cheek," Raph growled.

"Leon must die, Leo," Donnie snapped.

"That's what I love about ya, Babe," Raph crooned, "Ya know when ta get violent."

"Calm down you two," Leo whispered, "We aren't killing anyone and I can't believe you said that, Donnie."

"I won't have some stranger taking advantage of my baby brother even if that stranger looks like you, Leo," Don hissed.

"I don't think Leon meant any harm since he was simply commenting on the color of Mikey's eyes, " Leo stated, "He acts more…laid back than I and he and his brothers genuinely seems to be fascinated with Mikey. I want one of us with our little brother at all times until the three leave just in case. Understood?"

I couldn't help feeling a little irritated as Leo crawled into bed beside me. The newcomers were just being nice to me. Why was it that it was okay to leave me out, but the minute anyone showed me some attention my brothers got protective and resentful? I fell asleep next to Leo and woke some time later hearing movement out in the hallway. I eased out from the bed and walked down to the living room to see that Leon, Ray, and Nat were up.

"Good morning, Little One," Leon greeted me with a friendly smile, "I hope we didn't wake you."

"No. It's cool," I assured, "I usually get up earlier than my bros to start breakfast or the family starts whining. Are you guys hungry?"

"We didn't come here to mooch off of your family, Mikey," Nat protested looking unsure.

"We have plenty," I laughed out, "I'll make omelets."

"Eggs?" Ray asked brightening, "There hasn't been eggs in our world for several years."

I blinked in surprise. What kind of a world did Leon, Ray, and Nat come from?

"Well, there is here," I declared as I marched to the kitchen and began to pull out all the ingredients for breakfast, "Leon, what do you want on your omelet?"

"Cheese and onions, if I may," the other turtle answered looking delighted, "Thank you, Little One."

I nodded and quickly started prepping everything that I would need as the other three turtles and I chatted happily. I finished Leon's omelet and then Nat's. I was just about to ask Ray what he wanted when Leo clattered into the room looking frantic and froze at the scene. Raph entered behind our eldest brother looking murderous.

"Hey, Guys," I greeted, "Do you want the usual on your omelets?"

"Please," Leo agreed as he sat at the table and jerked a seething Raph down.

"Let me get Ray's order first," I said as I turned to the large turtle, "Well?"

"A western omelet, please," Ray grunted out.

I finished up everyone's orders and then laughed as Donnie came bumbling into the kitchen looking coffee deprived. He grabbed at an empty mug and then whined a single note when there was no coffee inside of it to drink.

"Where? Where?" Donnie mumbled as he stumbled along and then halted when I placed his mug of coffee in his hands and he took a deep gulp of the warm liquid, "Good. _So_ good."

We all watched in amusement as Don became more aware of his surroundings and blushed when he saw the newcomers staring at him. My bros and I bit our lips to keep from laughing and embarrassing the Brainiac any more than he already was.

"Omelets?" Donnie asked averting his gaze to me, "My usual please, Mikey."

I hummed my acknowledgement and finished off Donnie's breakfast just in time to make Father's cheese omelet. Finally, I constructed my own work of art and sat down to enjoy the fruits of my labor.

"That is disgustin'," Raph groaned as he watched me eat my cheese, onion, olive, anchovy, bacon, tomato, bologna, cream cheese, and spinach omelet as Father, Leo, and Donnie looked nauseous.

I grinned when Ray reached over and speared a piece of my omelet with his fork and tried a bite.

"Unique flavor," Ray said as he chewed, "Very hearty. I'd eat it, Kid."

"See?" I chirped happily, "Ray has better taste than you do, Raph."

"Hn," Raph snorted as he glared at the older version of himself, "It's rude ta take food off of other people's plates."

"Also rude ta put your brother's tastes down," Ray quipped back as he stood and began to calmly walk away, "I'm just sayin'."

Leon winked at me as he and Nat followed their brother out to the living room. I jumped when Raph cut away the section of my omelet that Ray had touched and threw it away.

"Sick," Raph growled, "I don't want ya eatin' where his germs have contaminated ya food. We don't know where he's been."

"Ray was just being nice," I defended.

"Yes," Master Splinter agreed, "I sense nothing that says that those three mean ill will. I want you on your best behavior, my sons. You are representing our clan and I do not want you to dishonor our family name."

"Hai, Sensei," we all answered as Father walked out of the kitchen.

"You guys be nice to Leon, Ray, and Nat," I warned as I continued to eat, "They've have a hard life. There are no eggs left in their world. There is no telling what else they no longer have and they were very appreciative for a little omelet."

My three brothers looked at one another and did one of their silent conversation things again.

"I'll go apologize ta Ray," Raph grumbled as he stood and left the room.

"I'm sorry, Mikey, to be so suspicious," Leo added, "You know that I don't like the unknown and just because those three are alternate versions of ourselves does not mean they will react the way Raph, Donnie, and I would. I don't want you alone with them again."

"I am not a child," I denied with narrowed eyes, "I'll be eighteen in two months. That is legally an adult. Being two years older than me does not make you my guardian, Leo."

"Leo is just looking after you just like he still does for me," Donnie cajoled, "If it makes you feel any better Raph and Leo won't let me be alone with them either and I'm a year older than you. You did see that Raph wouldn't let me get around him either when the others arrived, right?"

I leaned back in my seat thoughtfully. It did make me feel better that it was not just me that was being sheltered.

"Fine," I agreed as Leo relaxed and gave me a smile, "I'll let one of you be 'bodyguard,' but I think you're being overly suspicious."

"Yo, Mikey!" Raph hollered from the living room, "Come show Ray and Nat your gamin' skills. They are under tha impression that they rule Super Smash Brothers."

I eagerly ran into the living room and spent a couple of hours thrashing Ray and Nat into the ground as Raph cheered me on. Leon came to sit beside me on the floor and tried to heckle me into losing.

"Cheater," I giggled as I concentrated on the game.

"There is no fairness in war," Leon chuckled before growing silent when Master Splinter entered the room to call us into training.

To be continued…


	5. Chapter 5

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Five

The three newcomers were invited to join our training and I marveled at their skill levels. They had more training under their belts because they were older, but my own brothers were tenacious and held their own against their doppelgangers. It was fun to see how far we could all push one another and even Raph smiled a bit more than he usually does.

"You three have honored your Sensei by keeping your skills sharp," Master Splinter complimented as he began to pair us off to spar.

"Thank you, Master Splinter," Leon said with a touch of pride in his voice, "It was hard to get my brothers into the dojo sometimes when our Sensei left us, but we still train to a schedule nearly identical to what you and your sons do."

"Wouldn't have been so hard if ya had asked instead of ordered," Ray snorted as Leon rolled his eyes.

"Yes. I know that now," Leon agreed as Nat chuckled, "Will you ever let that go?"

"Maybe," Ray drawled as he winked at his oldest brother.

It was kind of neat to get a glimpse into how these brothers had mellowed over the years together. Since my Raph and Leo had started a relationship, they weren't as hard on one another, but they still fought. I wandered if they would mellow like Leon and Ray.

I was surprised to be paired off with Ray for my spar session. I looked up at him with an inkling of trepidation. The dude is seriously huge.

"I will take it easy with ya, Kid," Ray informed me before grunting when I flipped him to the floor.

"I can hold my own," I grinned out as the taller turtle got back up to his feet with a smirk while my brothers laughed from around us, "I'm smaller than you, but the bigger they are the harder they fall."

"I love your kid brother," Nat cheered from beside my oldest brother, "Leo, can we keep him? Pretty please?!"

"W-what? No!" Leo stuttered out as Nat burst into laughter.

The spar was great since I was unfamiliar with how Ray would react as we fought so I had to keep my wits about me. He was stronger, but I was faster and in the end we called a truce since neither of us could get the upper hand.

"Ya good, Kid," Ray encouraged as he passed me and slapped me on the shell so hard I flew forward about a foot and had to be steadied by a grinning Nat.

"Good to see someone keeping him on his toes for a change that isn't me having to get my teeth nearly knocked out," Leon interjected as he walked after his brother, "Ray had a lot of fun. I haven't seen him this relaxed in years. You've been a breath of fresh air in our lives. Thanks, Mikey."

It felt good to bring a smile to the newcomers' faces and I could tell that my own brothers were proud of my display. For the first time in a long time, my heart wasn't hurting so bad. Helping Leon, Nat, and Ray feel welcomed was also helping me get my mind off of my brothers' relationship.

That afternoon, Nat explained in great detail about this Maxus person. The dude was major bad news. Leo and Leon worked up a plan to take Maxus and Shredder down which would need all of us working together very closely. That evening we scouted the lay of the land at the shipyard. When we returned I jumped in the shower first and accidently went to my room on autopilot. I jerked in shock when I found Nat kissing Ray as Leon held both of his brothers.

"I'm sorry!" I squeaked as I turned to flee, but Leon jumped up and grabbed my arm.

"It is okay, Little One," the older turtled reassured, "I'm sure that this is nothing you haven't seen before in your own mating pack."

I looked down sadly and cursed to myself as tears filled my eyes.

"Ya haven't?" Ray asked bewildered, "But I can tell that ya brothers are mates and…and…_shit_."

I bit my lip to try to hide the quivering as the three turtles looked at me in dawning horror.

"You're not a part of their relationship," Leon determined, "How can they not see how much you love them? I saw it from the minute we met. Why? Look at you!"

"H-huh?" I stuttered looking up.

"Mikey, you're a very handsome turtle," Nat complimented making me drop my head and blush, "I wish to God that we had a little brother like you at home. I'd have you in my bed so quick your head would spin."

"You'd have ta fight ta get ta him first," Ray snickered as he poked his little brother's head before looking up at me, "I'd treat ya like tha treasure ya are, Mikey."

I looked up wide eyed. Odd feelings raced through me. I had never been looked at with such desire before and it was disconcerting.

"You could come home with us, Mikey," Leon offered as he stroked one of my cheeks once again and looked deep into my eyes, "We could offer you a spot in our mating pack. We would love and honor you until the end of your days."

I gasped and stepped back. Leave my brothers?

"Just think about it," Leon continued, "Little One, you have already wormed your way into our hearts. You wouldn't be alone ever again."

"I'm _not_ alone…I'm…my family loves me," I blabbered as strange feelings raced through me.

"Being loved by family and being loved by a mate is two totally different things," Nat explained, "Just think about it like Leon said. It would be wonderful to have you with us, Mike."

The thought of being loved like a true mate was an enticing offer. I looked up at my brothers' doppelgangers as their offer ran through my mind. The three were so much like my brothers, but so different. Could I ever have feelings for them like I had for my bros?

"Mikey?" Donnie called making me jump as he walked up the stairs and looked into the room suspiciously, "What are you guys talking about?"

"Leon was telling me about his world," I quickly lied feeling flustered and unsure, "Can I sleep with you tonight? Leo kicks."

"Sure," Donnie easily agreed even as his eyes studied the other turtles in the room, "Let's get to bed. Tomorrow is going to be a long day and we must be at peak, performance levels."

I looked over my shoulder as I walked beside Donnie. The three, older turtles smiled at me encouragingly before shutting the door to my room.

"Mikey, you seem flushed," Donnie observed as I walked beside him.

"Probably because I just showered," I lied again even as I saw Donnie giving me a sideways glance, "I guess I'm a little nervous about tomorrow."

"Me too," Don admitted as I looked up at him, "I hope that everything goes according to plan. We've got to get that weapon from Shredder for both our world and the other turtles' world as well."

I nodded and Donnie and I went to bed even as my mind raced with what Leon, Ray, and Nat had asked of me.

"Mikey, I don't mean to pry, but it seemed like you were having an intense conversation with the other turtles," Donnie said as he rolled over to face me in the bed, "What was that all about? You looked a little…I don't know…upset or anxious to me."

"It's sad to hear about their world," I lied for a third time, "I'm fine."

My bro seemed to accept my lie and I slept fitfully, but got enough rest to be ready for the battle. The next day was filled with preparations for stopping Maxus from getting the weapon. Every detail was hammered out as to what role each of us would play. I watched as Raph, Leo and Donnie held one another in a hidden corner of the garage like they always did when going into battle shortly before we were supposed to leave. I guess it was a way to say "be safe and know that I love you and want you to fight to return to me." I sighed from my hidden spot and felt the twinge in my heart once again.

"You three be safe. You need one another," I prayed in my head as I walked back into the living room to see Leon, Ray, and Nat looking at me compassionately as if they knew what I had just been watching.

I smiled at them before leaving to get a bit of meditation in prior to leaving. The sight of my brother's affection had filled me with hurt and I needed to center myself again. It was Raph that came and found me when it was time to go.

"Is everyone clear on the plan?" Leo asked before we left the lair.

We all nodded and soon we were on the surface and flitting from rooftop to rooftop on the way to stop Maxus and Shredder. We silently reached the shipyard and spread out into our pairings or assigned positions. Donnie and I were together, hidden away on a warehouse roof. It was my job to keep a lookout to warn the others of any enemy movement through the headsets that each of us wore. My brother was setting up a small workstation so as to set off the bombs that had been placed the night before. Everything had to strategically fall into a certain order or the plan would fail.

"Leo, there is Foot everywhere," I reported as I continued to watch, "There are two getting dangerously close to where you and Raph are concealed."

"Noted," Leo hissed, "Any other movement?"

"Yes," I answered, "There is a tall man with a strange looking woman with silver hair standing in one of the warehouses to your right.

"That would be Maxus and Lady Kate," Leon chimed in.

"Fuck, Leon," Ray snorted over the headsets, "If that Bitch got a vision of us then our plan is blown. I thought she had died or somethin'. We haven't seen her in months."

"Who is Lady Kate and why were we not informed of her sooner?" Donnie demanded looking concerned.

"You heard Ray. We all thought she had died. Real name is Kathy Simpson," Nat explained, "She has premonition capabilities and is highly unstable. She isn't a fighter, but can ramble and confuse a person."

"Fearless?" Raph asked leaving the question left unspoken.

"Watch everything," Leo finally said after a few minutes of silence, "Stick to the plan for now. We'll improvise if we have to."

"Shredder just arrived in a black Hummer," I reported, "Maxus is moving towards the vehicle as I am speaking. Shredder is in view now."

I watched tensely as the two men sized one another up and started to talk. I noticed my brothers and the other turtles taking their places and then everything went to hell in a hand basket when that damn Lady Kate started shrieking "Turtles! Turtles!" over and over again.

"Donnie?" I gasped as our brothers and the newcomers began to battle for their lives.

"You stay here," my brother tersely ordered as he grabbed his bo and yelled into his mic, "Everyone try to push as much of the Foot towards the explosive sites as possible. Mikey will watch and let me know when the rest of you are clear and I will detonate the explosive with a manual controller! Be aware of your positions at all time!"

"I can fight!" I exclaimed looking wildly back at the chaos.

There was no way that I was going to allow my brothers and their doppelgangers to fight on their own without lending some assistance. There were too many Foot soldiers out there to stand on the sidelines.

"Not questioning your fighting skills, Mike. We need someone feeding us intel," Donnie tersely explained as my heart sank at the truth of the words, "You have the best eyes of all of us. I need you on lookout or my explosives will take one of us out instead of the enemy."

"Damn it!" I cursed as I nodded, "Fine! Be _safe_."

Donnie nodded and leapt down to join the fight. I didn't like this plan, but did as I was told. I heard jumbled yelling over the headpieces and cringed with each hit my comrades took, but soon enough Leo and Raph had pushed enough Foot towards one of the bomb sites.

"2B good to go," I snapped and then flinched when the explosion went off, "Leo, Shredders leaving with the weapon."

"On it," Leo and Leon both gritted out as they surged to the Hummer that was trying to leave through the one gate that led in and out of the shipyard.

I watched anxiously as Donnie became overrun for a moment, but he took down the Foot viciously. Ray and Nat were battling back to back while Raph was moving more foot into position for the next explosion site.

"1D good to go," I blurted and a second explosion rocked the shipyard as I squinted and noticed movement, "Maxus trying to make it to a motorboat."

"Fuck, no," Ray howled and I watched as he tackled the man to the ground as they fought against one another.

"1A and 2D good to go," I stated as my heart raced and fire took to the sky once again, "Leo and Leon have stopped the vehicle and are now in combat with Shredder. 1B good to go."

The explosions took out more of the Foot, but it was killing me to be up here while my family and friends were fighting down below. I grew chilled and suddenly realized I was no longer alone on the roof.

"Baby Turtle want to play?" a loud voice called out to me as I spun with my weapons out only to see the silver-haired woman swaying as she looked back at me.

"Mikey, who tha shell is that?" Raph gritted out as he fought from down below.

"Lady Kate," I answered as the wild-eyed woman hobbled unsteadily towards me.

"Little One, do _not_ listen to her," Leon's voice crackled over the headset, "She tries to twist your mind with half-truths and lies. Lady Kate is unbalanced in the head and has no rhyme or reason to how she reacts to situations."

"Baby Turtle is the eyes. He is the eyes," the Nut Job cackled, "Take out the eyes and you take down the army."

"Mikey, get to a different roof now," Leo barked through the headset, but he did not realize that there wasn't a different roof that was safe to get to.

"Back off, Lady," I snarled as I looked over my shoulder, "2C good to go."

I gasped as sharp nails raked down my cheek as Lady Kate grabbed the headset from me while the next explosion rang out.

"Get off me!" I snapped as I pushed Lady Kate away and swiped at the blood I felt dripping from my cheek.

I blinked when Lady Kate began spinning in circles around me and laughing her head off. Was she high or something?

"He's going to die, Baby Turtle," the cackling woman grinned at me as she dropped my headset to the roof and stepped on it, "The other turtles have made it out and stole my beloved's weapon. Big Turtle ended his life, but Little Purple is stuck, stuck, stuck. Goodbye, Little Purple, goodbye."

"Little Purple?" I questioned before gasping, "Donatello!"

I turned and saw that Donnie was getting overrun with none of the team close enough to help. I kicked the woman away and dove off the building to aid my brother. Leo, Ray, Nat, Leon and Raph were outside of the fence and wouldn't be able to make it through the smoking remains of the courtyard. I fought my way to Donnie and held the Foot back as he struggled to rise from a particularly hard blow to the stomach.

"Let's go," I hollered as I dragged his arm over my shoulder and jumped from one spot to the next to reach the roof of the warehouse I had been standing on, "Donnie, are you okay?"

"Winded," my brother panted out, "Bruised ribs. Roof is getting warmer. We need to go, Mikey."

Unfortunately, that was a bit of a problem. There was no place to go to. I saw Leo holding Raph back and I could hear him screaming for Donnie and I over Don's headset. He was screaming as loudly for me as he was for Donnie, but my heart throbbed again at the heartbreak I could hear when Raph was screaming his mate's name.

"We are on our way out," Donnie snapped into the headset as my heart sank at the reality of our situation.

Donnie did not realize that we had no escape route. The water was too far away to be able to jump and an explosion had made the area impossible to traverse.

"But the water is not too far away if you are thrown," I thought to myself and grabbed Donnie by the arm, "Bro, take care of Leo and Raph. They need you."

"What?" Donnie asked before screaming as I whirled him around and threw him as far as I could into the ocean waters.

"What tha shell was that?" I heard Raph's voice say as I bent and picked up my twisted headset from the ground where the crazy lady had dropped it, "I heard Don screamin' and then a splash. What's goin' on in there? Where are they?"

"Baby Turtle saved your mate," I heard Lady Kate warble over the headset and I turned to see the crazy woman hobbling up to my comrades as the skin on my feet ached at the heat rising off of the roof, "Can't save himself. Burn and fry. Baby Turtle is going to die."

To be continued…


	6. Chapter 6

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Six

"Baby Turtle saved your mate," I heard Lady Kate warble over the headset and I turned to see the crazy woman hobbling up to my comrades as the skin on my feet ached at the heat rising off of the roof, "Can't save himself. Burn and fry. Baby Turtle is going to die."

I swallowed as the roof grew too hot to stand upon and I leapt to the edge and down to see if I could find an unblocked path. There was little to be able to see through the fire and smoke and my lungs were beginning to burn with the heat in the air. I placed my ruined headset around my neck as the reality of the situation crashed down around me. There was little to no chance that I was going to make it out of this situation alive.

"Leo!" I heard Donnie screaming through my headset as I watched Ray and Nat helping him up on the wharf, "Mikey's still in there! He threw me into the water to save my life! He's trapped!"

"Mikey!" Leo hollered into the headset, "Michelangelo, can you hear me?! Report! Mikey, answer me! Where are you?!"

I coughed desperately, but chose not to answer my brother. It would hurt him more if I couldn't find a way out and he heard my dying cries. The thought of dying scared me badly, but at least I was able to get Donnie to safety. I wasn't going to die for nothing. I had kept my brothers' mating pack intact and that was more important to me than anything.

"Don, what are ya doin'?" I heard Raph cry and looked to see Donnie jerking Raph down and he began yelling to me through our red-banded brother's headset for me to stay low to try and avoid the smoke and get my shell outside.

Sighing, I looked down at my brothers one last time. I'd try for them, but the outcome was hopeless.

"I love you three so much," I thought as the coughing began to grow even more painful than the twinges in my heart, "I'll try my best for you, but don't grieve too much when I pass. This was my choice to make."

I leapt down to the ground and tried to find my way through the wreckage and flames. Everything was like a maze and more often than naught, I wound up at a dead end.

"Sunny turtle full of light," Lady Eyes crooned through the headset as I heard her dancing around my family and friends, "Loves everything with all his might. With his sacrifice his loved ones saved. He'll take the painful secret to his grave."

"Shut up, _Bitch_!" Raph howled as I heard a fist connect with skin, "Mikey? Where are ya, Bro? Answer me! I'll come get ya right now! Say somethin', dammit! Mike, ya answer me right now or so help me I'll…I'll kick ya tail."

I continued to cough as the smoke and flames swarmed around me even as amusement trickled through me. Leave it to Raphael to continue to threaten all the way until the end. As my vision began to waver, I realized that I wasn't going to make it out of this. I fell to the ground and gasped for air as my eyes burned. I sighed and wanted to hear from my brothers one last time.

"Leo?" I croaked out finally into the headset.

"Mikey!" Leo yelled making my head spin, "Where are you?"

"Love you," I gasped out, "L-love all of you so much. Raph. Don."

"Mikey!" Donnie's voices carried through the headset, "Don't you dare say that like you're saying goodbye! Where are you? We'll get you out!"

"Michelangelo, tell me where ya are!" Raph roared and I smiled at hearing his voice.

"Be good t-to…one another. Father…l-love him," I coughed out and then darkness claimed me.

I thought I would simply stop feeling or see the light, but instead I realized that I was standing over my still body as the flames licked and flickered closer and closer. It was a bit numbing to watch as you were dying. I jumped in surprise when a familiar shape rushed through the wreckage and flames.

"Leo!" I gasped seeing my older brother covered in soot and coughing horribly as he bent over my body, "Get out of here, Dude. Too late for me. Go to your mates. They can't lose you. I'm already gone. You're just trying to rescue an empty shell…oh! No pun intended."

Of course Leo couldn't hear me and he flipped my body over his shoulder and stood with a firm grip on my legs as my arms and head dangled limply. I watched as the ruined headset fell from my neck to the ground and shattered.

"Hold on, Mikey!" I heard him yell as he started forward, "I've got you, Little Brother! Just hang on!"

It was agony to watch Leo struggling to save me and several times wreckage nearly flattened the both of us. I followed and couldn't believe how determined Leo was to get us to safety. Finally, he rushed through a wall of flame into the arms of Raph and Leon.

"Leo! Thank goodness!" Raph cried catching our older brother as Leo's legs crumbled beneath him, "Donnie, Fearless found Mikey! God, Mike's unconscious!"

I watched Ray snatch me from Leo and lay my limp body on the ground as my oldest brother coughed and hacked terribly. Donnie pushed Ray aside and began to check me over as I watched Raph supporting Leo and looking torn as he looked between his mate and me.

"Not breathing!" Donnie gasped as he tilted my head back and breathed into my mouth before pushing down on my plastron, "Breathe, Mikey!"

Leo pushed Raph away and crawled over to my side as he continued to cough. I hurried forward to kneel next to my oldest brother as I watched him struggle to reach me.

"Thank you for trying to save me, Leo," I whispered as his shoulders shook from exhaustion and pain, "You have done everything you could. I'm gone. Let me go."

My hurt twinged as Leo erupted into more coughing and Raph had to support him as he hacked and wheezed.

"Here," Nat urged as he placed some kind of mask over Leo's muzzle, "Air is not always clean in our world. This will help you siphon the smoke from your lungs."

Leo pushed the mask away as he croaked my name while Donnie continued CPR with Leon's assistance. Raph nodded at Nat as he took the mask and held it back over his mate's muzzle.

"Don't struggle, Fearless," Raph ordered as Leo shook his head weakly, "Ya can't help Mikey if ya can't breathe, Leo."

"Come on, Little One," Leon encouraged as he pushed on my plastron in intervals while Donnie continued to breathe for me, "Open your eyes and breathe."

"No, Mikey, don't do this," Donnie choked as he tilted my head back and breathed into my mouth again, "Breathe for me, Little Brother."

I watched my limp form remain still and unresponsive. A weeping Donnie was pulled back by Raph and pushed towards Leo as my red-banded brother began to breathe into my mouth.

"Come on, Knucklehead," Raph snapped in between breaths, "Ya've scared us enough. Breathe, dammit!"

"Snap out of it, Kid," Ray called to me as he kept an eye on Nat who was scouting the perimeter for danger.

"Please, Mikey, don't leave us," Leo growled through the mask Donnie was holding to his muzzle, "Breathe! You've got to breathe!"

"Mikey," Donnie whimpered as he cradled one of my hands, "Baby Bro, breathe."

"Cops!" Nat hollered as he ran from a checkpoint, "We've got to get out of here!"

I looked at my brothers working so hard to save me as tear tracks washed soot off of their cheeks. It hurt to see their pain, but suddenly my body jerked and choked. I was surprised to see my lungs gasp in air as my family and friends looked relieved.

"We've got ta go," Ray instructed as I watched him slip another one of those strange masks over my muzzle as my body began to tremble and cough, "I'll carry Leo. Ya got the kid, Raph?"

"Got em," Raph agreed as he slid his arms under my knees and shoulders and lifted me, "Don't be an ass, Fearless. We got ta move. Mikey's hurt and ya can barely walk."

Leo glared, but allowed Ray to scoop him up. If the situation wasn't so dire it would have been funny seeing Leo looking so small in Ray's arms. I had to run to follow as our group bolted down the wharf and into the nearest manhole. Donnie hovered between Leo and I to check our conditions. It was weird to feel as he sometimes passed right through me. Why was I still outside of my body?

"What has happened?" Sensei demanded when we burst into the Lair, "Leonardo! Michelangelo!"

"Leon, please report to my father," Donnie yelled over his shoulder as he encouraged Ray and Raph into his lab, "Everyone stay out here. I need room to work."

Raph laid me on one of the cots in the room as Leo was settled on another.

"Thank you," Donnie gritted out as he pushed Ray towards the door, "Give me room. Raph, get some fresh oxygen into Leo and moisten his skin with some water. Rub his shoulders and neck to try and ease the coughing."

As Donnie took care of my body, I watched as Raph eased an oxygen mask over his mate's muzzle and sat Leo up to rub him down with a wet towel. Leo couldn't stop coughing and Raph massaged his shoulders and neck as Leo's coughs grew less strained.

"Mikey?" Leo croaked as he continued to cough.

"Donnie's working with him now," Raph assured while still looking very worried, "Mike's still breathing. He'll be fine."

"Without oxygen," Leo wheezed, "How long without oxygen? Damage?"

Raph's eyes widened as he looked over at Donnie and I fearfully.

"We won't know until Mikey wakes," Donnie admitted as he glanced over his shoulder, "His lungs are pretty seared and his feet have some burns. Overall, he looks physically pretty good, but I am worried that he is still unconscious."

The door opened and Nat stepped in timidly.

"I also have medical knowledge," Nat informed my brothers, "Is there anything I can help with?"

"Yes," Donnie agreed as he tried to soothe my body's hacking and coughing, "Leo has some burns and we all have some injuries. Would you check up on everyone and use any of my supplies you need to bandage any wounds?"

Nat nodded and I numbly watched as he began to treat and wrap Leo's burns and cuts first. Raph growled, but allowed the older turtle to clean some of his wounds and sew up a nasty gash on his shoulder.

"Um…Donnie?" Nat asked looking unsure as my brother glanced up at him from supporting my torso and rubbing my shell to settle my coughs, "Do you want me to see to your wounds?"

"I'm fine," Donnie snapped as his eyes returned to me, "The worst that I've got is some bruised ribs which I will have you wrap later. See to your brothers and please send our father in here."

Master Splinter entered the room a second later and hurried over to check on Leo and I with a frantic look on his face.

"Father, can you make that herbal medicine you once made me when I was sick two years ago? The one that you put in the hot water and had me breathe in the steam," Donnie asked, "I think the medicinal steam will calm Leo's and Mikey's lungs."

"I've got some already mixed," Sensei agreed, "I thought you might need that when I heard the coughing. I'll be right back."

It was amusing to see Raph having to argue with Leo to lean over the bowl with a towel over his head to breathe in the steam, but Raph won and soon Leo's coughs were beginning to dissipate. Donnie ran some kind of a tube that sucked up the medicinal steam and pushed it into my lungs via another mask. Donnie looked relieved that the spasming of my diaphragm was subsiding with the medicine.

"Fearless?!" Raph gasped as Leo went limp in his arms, "Donnie!"

My heart went to my throat as my purple-banded brother raced over to his two mates.

"He's just reached the end of his limits," Donnie reassured Raph as he eased the oxygen mask back on Leo's snout after he examined our brother and covered him with a blanket, "He's asleep and will be fine."

"How's Mikey?" Raph asked as he tucked Leo under a blanket and walked over to look down at my unconscious body.

"His lungs are going to take a bit of time to heal, but he seems to be breathing okay now," Donnie sighed out, "I've wrapped the burns on his feet."

"Are these…did that _Bitch_ claw Mikey?" Raph growled as he looked at the bloody, scratch marks on my cheek.

"Looks like it," Donnie answered as he began to clean the soot off of my face before disinfecting the marks and taping some gauze over the welts, "What happened to Lady Kate?"

"Crazy woman threw herself off of the wharf inta shallow water and broke her own neck," Raph explained as I watched Donnie rub my skin down with a wet cloth and then covered me with a blanket, "What tha shell was she ramblin' on about?"

"I'm not sure," Donnie said looking thoughtful which made me panic, "Do you remember how it went."

"That was one of her prophecies," Leon said as he walked into the room with Ray and Nat and I saw that they each had some bandages sporadically wrapped on their being where clothes had to be torn away, "She said, 'Sunny turtle full of light. Loves everything with all his might. With his sacrifice his loved ones saved. He'll take the painful secret to his grave.' She liked to say things like a nursery rhyme."

"Grave?" Raph hissed as Donnie looked horrified, "She sayin' Mikey's goin' ta die?"

"Lady Kate's prophecies were not all seeing," Nat soothed, "Most times they just never made any sense at all and had hidden truths mixed within."

"What 'secret' has Mikey been keeping from us?" a voice questioned hoarsely making all eyes turn towards Leo who was awake and looking tired and miserable.

"Leo, don't talk," Donnie ordered as he hurried over.

I watched as Donnie gave Leo some water to sip. I was scared and panicking that Lady Kate might have figured out the love I felt for my brothers and prayed that Leo would just let it go, but not my stubborn brother. The older turtles averted their eyes which did not go unnoticed by my eldest brother.

"What do you know?" Leo demanded as he began to rise and try to get out of bed.

Donnie and Raph pushed him back down, but looked at Leon, Ray, and Nat with narrowed eyes.

"Well?" Leo demanded again.

"Look. We just stumbled into your Little One's secret and it is not something we can tell you," Leon voiced looking uncomfortable.

"_Bullshit_!" Raph growled, "Mikey's our baby brother. We'd do anythin' for him and if ya haven't noticed he'd do anythin' for us. Or did ya miss that nearly sacrificin' himself for Donnie ta escape tha flames? Tell us what ya guys know!"

I felt horrible and hoped that Leon, Nat, and Ray wouldn't tell my secret. They just couldn't.

"Please?" Donnie softly pleaded, "The rhyme says 'painful secret' and our Mikey had been suffering from unexplained pains in his chest. I still think that Mikey should have woken by now. Maybe this secret is what is keeping him unconscious."

"Tha kid's broken-hearted," Ray stated as Leon and Nat turned to him angrily, "I ain't lyin' ta them, Bros. Leo, Raph, and Donnie have done a lot for us tonight."

"What do you mean 'broken-hearted', Ray?" Leo asked as he leaned forward looking troubled and a little pissed off, "I was not aware my baby brother was in any kind of a relationship."

I whimpered as Ray shifted uncomfortably.

"Was my brother involved with someone?" Leo hissed as he looked even angrier.

"Ya think that Mikey has been datin' or somethin'?" Raph questioned as Donnie looked over at my body and back to Leo with wide eyes.

"I don't know," Leo gritted out as he kept his gaze on Ray, "Tell me what you know. Has someone hurt our brother?"

"Don't say it! Don't say it!" I yelled hoping to be heard.

"Yeah. You," Ray answered making Leo recoil at the words.

To be continued…


	7. Chapter 7

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Seven

"What do you mean 'broken-hearted', Ray?" Leo asked as he leaned forward looking troubled and a little pissed off, "I was not aware my baby brother was in any kind of a relationship."

I whimpered as Ray shifted uncomfortably.

"Was my brother involved with someone?" Leo hissed as he looked even angrier.

"Ya think that Mikey has been datin' or somethin'?" Raph questioned as Donnie looked over at my body and back to Leo.

"I don't know," Leo gritted out as he kept his gaze on Ray, "Tell me what you know. Has someone hurt our brother?"

"Don't say it! Don't say it!" I yelled hoping to be heard.

"Yeah. You," Ray answered making Leo recoil at the words.

Leo's coughing resumed as he spluttered while Donnie patted his mate's shell looking stunned. My eyes cut to Rapael and gulped at the rage that was darkening his eyes.

"What tha shell is ya problem?" Raph angrily hissed as he pushed himself between Ray and Leo, "My brother is weakened due ta a battle that we fought for your sake. Tha same battle that nearly took Mikey's life and now you're tryin' ta accuse Leo, who ran inta _flames_ to save our baby brother, that he _hurt_ Mikey. Fuck ya, Asshole!"

"Fuck _ya _right _back_!" Ray roared as he grabbed Raph's plastron edge and jerked him forward even as Nat and Leon ran to restrain him, "I ain't just blamin' Leo! I'm blamin' all three of ya! Ya left him out! Ya left that sweet kid feelin' neglected and unwanted! Ya made him cry. Do ya realize how much he's been _hurtin'_? I want to kick ya asses so bad that my foot already feels tha impression of your tails!"

"What?" Raph gasped as he pulled away, "I don't…."

"He knows that you three are mates," Leon interrupted making my brothers freeze up as I trembled in place, "Little One has known for a long time and it hurts him terribly. Your Michelangelo loves you three so much and yet you throw him to the side as if he was less than nothing. He is all alone and _knows_ this. What you three have done is horrible and cruel."

"You don't understand," Donnie denied looking sick, "We _do_ love Mikey and…."

"You have a funny way of showing it," Nat said as he interrupted Donnie coldly, "Being a mutant turtle means that there is nobody but our siblings to turn to for love and affection. You three turned to one another and left Mikey nothing at all. You're slowly _killing_ him inside and he hides it to keep you three happy because he loves you so much he'd rather suffer than see any of you upset."

By this point I was pressed up against the wall breathing harshly. The words were true, but I hadn't ever wanted my brothers to find out.

"Yamete**-**kudasai (stop)," Master Splinter ordered as he walked into the room and faced the older turtles, "Do not blame my sons for this is all _my_ fault."

I blinked and glanced over at Father. His fault? How in the world was this Master Splinter's fault? Sensei looked apologetic as he walked over to my body to take my hand in his and sat next to the bed. It hurt to see him looking so forlorn. My three brothers also looked devastated and Donnie had tears running down his cheeks.

"You see, it was I that asked Leonardo, Raphael, and Donatello to keep their relationship a secret from Michelangelo," Master Splinter admitted making me gasp in shock, "My sons love their brother as much as they love one another, but I deemed that the baby of the family was too young to be approached romantically. I condoned my elder sons' relationship, but refused to allow them to draw my baby into behavior I felt he was not ready to handle. I thought that I was keeping Michelangelo safe."

"You assumed that he would be so naïve that he would never find out," Leon guessed as Sensei nodded.

"Father, wouldn't allow us ta court Mikey until he was eighteen," Raph admitted, "We've been countin' tha days down. I mean, _look_ at him. Who wouldn't be attracted ta our baby brother? I sure saw ya three takin' in an eyeful when ya first arrived and it pissed tha shit out of all of us. I'm even more pissed ta hear that he's been hurtin' so damn bad. _Shit_!"

"Mikey is kind, loving, wild, and gorgeous and we love him _dearly_," Donnie confessed, "Leo and Raph got together first and then I was invited into the mating pack over a year ago. We've been waiting to ask Mikey to join us. There are not enough words to describe how much we all love him and want him to be our mate. Only then will our mating pack be complete. How could we have missed the signs so badly? How could we allow our baby brother to suffer so long?"

"This is the first time that I have ever said this," Leo broke in as he gestured to Raph to assist him out of bed and he walked over to where my body rested with shaky legs, "But we shouldn't have listened to you, Father. Mikey has too much empathy and can usually get to the heart of things very quickly in regards to people's feelings. I had always feared that Mikey would feel betrayed and hurt when we did finally admit to him our relationship and now I know that I was right. We love him as dearly as we love each other. I could kick myself! I should have seen how much pain Mikey has been hiding."

"I agree with you, Leonardo," Father sighed out before turning to me, "Michelangelo, it is time to wake up so that your brothers can tell you something very important. Wake up, Child. There is much to discuss, my son. Come back to us."

I gaped at everything as all the information continued to whirl through my head. Leon stepped forward and I watched as he and his brothers looked at one another and nodded.

"There is something that we need to share that you will not be very happy about," Leon added making my brothers look up at him sharply, "My brothers and I have invited Little One to join _our_ mating pack when we discovered his secret."

Chaos broke out as Raph lunged at Leon and Leo began to yell angrily until he began to cough harshly while his knees began to buckle. Donnie and Nat had to pull my hotheaded brother from Leon as he screamed obscenities. Ray stood silently seething as I fell to my knees and rocked against the wall. Was Lady Kate going to jump out and tell everyone that I used to suck my thumb next just to put the cherry on top of this awful sundae?

"Sick, Bastards!" Raph howled as he struggled, "Ya much older than my baby brother! Fuckin' pedophiles!"

"Raph, calm yourself," Father ordered as Donnie hurried over to Leo who had been forced to sit on the floor as his coughing increased.

"There is no way in shell you are taking Mikey away from us!" Leo croaked before Donnie forced a breathing mask back over my brother's livid face.

"Breathe deeply, Leo," Donnie ordered as our older brother leaned his head against him before my gentler brother narrowed his eyes up at the others, "You will have to fight through us to get to our baby brother. You saw what we are capable of tonight. You _will_ lose."

I watched as Raph glared hatefully at the older turtles as he walked over and kneeled down next to his mates.

"Ya heard my two mates," Raph snapped as he put his arms under Leo's knees and shoulders and lifted our brother back over to his cot even as Donnie continue to hold the oxygen mask in place, "Mikey ain't going' nowhere. Tha battle is over. Go home and forget about ever comin' back to our dimension. Leave."

"That is not your decision to make," Sensei stated making my brothers and I look at him in shock, "Once Michelangleo wakes you will present him with your actual feelings. At that time, your brother will make his own decision of who he chooses to mate. It hurts me to say that you cannot assume that your brother will automatically fall into your arms after having suffered for so long on his own."

It hurt to see my three brothers wince as if they had been punched in the gut. My mind reeled in shock. My brothers loved me and had always wanted me as a mate? Father was the one that had made them not share this with me, but I was stuck outside of my body and felt overwhelmed and confused. This was a mess.

I watched as Leon, Ray, and Nat went to get cleaned up and go to bed. Father kissed me on the cheek before leaving to rest since everything had worn him out. I shook in place not knowing what to do next.

"Raph," Leo breathed out through his oxygen mask as his two mates looked to him," Take me over to Mikey's cot."

"You need to get some sleep, Leo," Donnie denied.

"I will, Don," Leo acknowledged before coughing lightly and pushing the breathing mask off, "There is something that I need to affirm with our baby brother. I sensed something right when Leon dropped his bomb on us. I don't think Mikey is in a natural sleep."

Raph and Donnie exchanged glances with one another in shock as I stood to watch. Raph lifted our brother in his arms again and set him next to me on the cot despite the fit being tight. I walked up and tried to touch Leo, but my hand passed through him as my brother laid his hand against my temple and closed his eyes for several long minutes. Leo jerked his eyes open and gasped.

"What is it, Leo?" Raph inquired looking nervous and concerned.

"He's in a meditation trance," Leo chuckled as Donnie, Raph, and I started in surprise, "I wasn't able to pick up on it at first, but I think that Mikey began to control his heart rate and breathing while in the flames to protect himself once the heat and smoke overwhelmed him. It feels like it was done unconsciously without him having realized what he was doing."

"Mikey shut off his mind to escape feeling himself burning alive," Donnie breathed in wonder, "That probably saved his life since he needed less oxygen to breathe and you could reach him in time. That also means that Mikey should wake up and not have any brain damage from loss of oxygen, God willing."

"So why ain't he wakin' up now?" Raph fussed as he continued supporting Leo and reached down to stroke my uninjured cheek.

"He's lost," Leo stated, "The state he is in now is dangerous. We are going to have to go get him."

I watched as my brothers took one another's hands and joined a circle with my hands as they eased into meditation.

"Don't know how I'm lost," I crabbed irritably, "I'm right here."

But suddenly I wasn't right there anymore, but smack dab in the middle of my mind sheltered by the shield that I had erected to protect myself. I wandered how I had gotten back here when I heard my oldest brother's call.

"Mikey!" Leo yelled as his astral projection flickered showing his exhaustion, "You're safe now. Take down your shield and wake up."

"Leo?" I asked as I walked to the shield and placed my hands where his lay on the opposite side of the barrier, "I don't know how to get the shield down. I don't remember constructing it and it feels different."

"Mikey," Donnie called as he and Raph appeared next to Leo, "Oh, Baby, we've been so worried."

Baby? That was new. I blinked back tears and wrapped my arms around myself as a whirl of emotions tumbled through my head. This couldn't be real. Everything must be a coma dream or something. This couldn't be real. Not for me.

"Hey, Knucklehead, guess what?" Raph asked making Leo and Donnie look at him, "Heard that ya found out about my mates and I."

I nodded as I watched my brothers. They were smiling so kindly at me. It had to be a dream. This wasn't real. None of this was real. It couldn't be.

"You heard and saw everything that was said in the lab, didn't you?" Leo asked as he continued to flicker as he jerked me from my thoughts, "I had to literally call out to your soul to pull you back into your mind. You were stuck outside of your body, weren't you?"

"Yes to both of your questions," I admitted, "Is it true? What you guys and Father said? Because it can't be true. It can't be."

"We have always loved you and wanted you as our mate, Baby," Donnie assured looking so sad at my obvious distress, "It hurt to have to keep our feelings from you until you turned eighteen. Every word was true. We've been waiting so long for you."

I placed my hands to my head and shook my head. This was too much.

"I heard…and the _touching_…left alone," I babbled as my brother's looked distraught and I knocked my fist against my plastron above my heart as the sobbing began, "It hurt and h-hurt and I was _alone_! It hurt so b-bad! Always aching and c-couldn't breathe!"

"Shell, Baby! I never meant for you to suffer like this," Leo soothed getting closer to the shield, "We are so sorry that you went through so much pain and loneliness. Please calm yourself so that we can help you wake up. Then we can share with you all of our hopes and dreams that we had decided would happen when we were finally able to ask you to be our mate. We love you very, very much and have always felt this way about you from the minute our relationship changed from brothers to mates."

"You left me alone," I whispered as tears coursed down my face.

"Never again," Raph vowed looking upset, "I ain't leavin' ya alone ever again. I love ya, Mikey. We all love ya."

I hiccupped as the tears continued. I wanted to trust my brothers, but my sense of betrayal still hovered close to the surface.

"Ah!" Leo groaned as he collapsed to his hands and knees and trembled with his head hanging down.

"Leo!" Raph, Donnie and I cried.

"I'm fine," Leo breathed as Raph supported his torso while my oldest brother sat on the ground having no more strength left to stand, "I'm nearly spent. Baby, listen to me it is not safe for you to stay in this state for too long. Calm your mind for me. Everything is going to be okay again. Just trust me."

I blinked at him as I sat in lotus position and tried to breathe deeply. Leo had used a lot of energy to save me from the flames and was now using the last of his strength to come and help get me free from my own mind. The least I could do was listen to him.

"Good, Baby," Leo said, "Close your eyes and imagine a crack in the shield. Open that crack more and more."

I struggled at first, but finally begin to feel more in control and before I knew it the shield shattered and tumbled around me. I gasped at all the feelings that hit me from a source that was not my own. Love, adoration, desire, need, protectiveness and more bombarded my mind. I felt hands pull me into a hug that included all three of my brothers.

"Feel that?" Leo asked when I looked up at him and nodded, "Our minds are open to you. Look and see that everything we've said is the truth. You have always been 'Baby' to us and I hope that you still want us for your mates because we have been waiting for you to join us for such a long time. We need you, Baby. We love you."

"Look and see that you have never really been alone," Donnie urged as he cuddled me close, "The time of loneliness and pain is over, Baby. We will never allow you to feel that way again."

I did look and dropped every shield in my own mind. I began to sob once again when I realized that my brothers really had always loved and wanted me. This was no dream.

"We've got ta wake up now," Raph informed me as he rubbed at the tears beneath my eyes while Donnie remained wrapped around me, "You and Fearless need ta get some real rest. Leo's done and you're nearly there as well."

I looked and saw that Leo was practically sleeping against Raph's chest as his and my astral projections were flickering showing that our strength was nearly gone. Donnie reached and shut my eyes and before I knew it I felt myself return to awareness. I struggled, but got my eyes open and I blinked up at Leo, Raph, and Donnie sleepily. My throat and chest felt dry and burned. I coughed lightly and squeezed my eyes shut painfully.

"Here, Baby," Donnie cooed as he lifted my breathing mask off and help me sip from a cup of water with a straw, "We'll talk some more later. You get some rest and know how much we love you while you sleep, okay?"

I looked at him and offered a small smile as he placed the oxygen mask back on my muzzle. Donnie kissed me on my forehead while my eyes grew heavy from weariness.

"We're goin' ta be right here," Raph assured as he too leaned down and kissed me, "Love ya, Baby."

Leo seemed too exhausted to talk, but he kissed me on my hand he was holding and mouthed "love you" before he was picked up and laid back on his own cot. I looked over when Leo began to cough lightly while Raph rubbed his plastron soothingly.

"Damn, smoke," Donnie hissed as he put Leo's breathing mask back on his face before seeing my look of concern, "Leo is going to be fine and so are you. Sleep now. Everything is going to be okay, Baby. Relax."

I closed my eyes and felt soft hands stoking the side of my face. It was comforting and I fell into a deep, dreamless sleep. A small niggling feeling stayed within my mind, however, when I realized that I was going to have to decide which pack I belonged with when I woke next.

To be continued…


	8. Chapter 8

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Chapter Eight

I slept for what felt like a very long time before voices encouraged me to open my eyes. I blinked them open and saw Donnie and Raph watching over me.

"Fearless, guess whose blue eyes just opened?" Raph drawled as he smirked over at a pouting Leo.

"Wouldn't have to guess if you and Donnie hadn't handcuffed me to the cot," Leo snapped as he shook his cuffed hand in our direction, "I told you that I am fine and can get out of bed. It has been four days since the battle. Take this off of me this minute, Raphael. I want to see Mikey."

I listened as Raph and Leo sniped back and forth at one another. It was then that I realized that I had a tube across my snout that was supplying me oxygen.

"Baby, no speaking," Donnie warned me when I opened my mouth to ask about the tube, "Your lungs are going to need some time to heal from the heat of the flames and the tube will help keep your lungs from having to work so hard to draw in oxygen. You'll heal completely as long as you take care of yourself."

I began to register that my throat and lungs still hurt and my feet felt like they were on fire. I grunted in distress as my eyes filled with tears. I was still so tired and the pain really was hurting me.

"What's wrong with Mikey?" Leo demanded as he stood and dragged the cot behind him and looked down at me, "Baby, what's wrong?"

I gasped and looked up at him tearfully. I looked down at my feet and back up to him.

"Donnie, the burns on his feet are hurting him," Leo explained as Raph held my hand to try and soothe me, "Do something!"

"I've got a painkiller right here," Donnie declared as he walked up with a needle that made my eyes bug out, "It's okay, Mikey. I'll put this in your IV line. I won't give you a shot."

I nodded and was able to relax after about ten to fifteen minutes when the pain killer began to take effect. Donnie sat on the other side of my cot and peeled a bandage from my cheek.

"Good. The scratches from that woman are healing well," he said as he examined the marks and cleaned them before putting on a new bandage, "You won't have any scars on your face at all."

Again, I nodded as my brothers smiled down at me. It was good to see them, but I frowned at the cot that was pulling on my older brother's wrist.

"Let me get that for you, Fearless," Raph chuckled out as he pushed Leo on a chair next to me, across from Donnie, and began to unlock the handcuff from our brother's wrist, "We'll have to save these for another time, huh?"

"Don't say those kind of things around Mikey," Leo growled as he covered my ears with his hands as Donnie giggled, "Keep your perverse, sexual fantasies to yourself, Perv. I won't have you tainting my baby brother."

"Teasin' only," Raph reassured before frowning when he looked at me, "Mikey, when ya was allowed ta see our minds we got a glimpse inta yours and what I saw made my heart nearly stop. It was horrible ta feel how much ya have been hurtin'. I am so sorry, Baby."

"We all are," Donnie offered as he helped me sit up by adding more pillows behind my back, "To make you feel so alone and knowing that you were literally in pain because we were too cowardly to go against Sensei makes me so ashamed."

I used my hands to mime writing. Donnie turned and snatched up a notepad and pen and handed them to me. I wrote and handed him the pad.

"'_Not your fault if Sensei asked you not to say anything,_'" Donnie read out loud and then handed me the pad back, "It is my fault for not noticing how bad things had gotten for you, Baby. You and I are best friends and I know you backwards and forwards. I realized that you had been acting off and didn't do anything about it."

I scribbled out another note and Leo leaned over to see it.

"'_Hid my feelings. Thought that I would interfere with your mates. I would never have told you the truth_,'" Leo read, "Baby, from now on I don't want you to hold anything back from us. Promise?"

I hooked my pinky finger with his and shook his hand as Leo smiled at me acknowledging my promise.

"I hate tha wordin' of 'your mates,'" Raph grumped, "I don't think we officially asked ya yet, but would ya do us tha honor of being a part of our matin' pack?"

I looked up with wide eyes before my lips began to tremble. My heart twinged in a good way and I rubbed at my chest. There never had been any option, but one.

"Baby, are you hurting again?" Donnie demanded as he hovered anxiously, but I shook my head and wrote again.

"'_Happy_,'" Donnie recited as he tenderly rubbed my cheek while I gave everyone a watery smile, "Does that mean you are saying 'yes' to us?"

I nodded my head as the tears flowed. My new mates gathered me up in their arms and I reveled in finally feeling Leo's protective arms, Raph's strength, and Donnie's gentle lips kissing my temple as I was rocked between them. I pulled away and scratched out another quick note. Leo looked and laughed loudly.

"'_Took you long enough_,'" Leo informed Donnie and Raph with a grin which they returned, "I know, Baby, it did take us long enough, didn't it? So long, that those other turtles actually thought we would let you be taken away from us. We would have fought tooth and nail for you. Nobody is ever taking any of my mates from me. Nobody."

I enjoyed the nuzzle that Leo gave me, but my eyes widened as I remembered Leon, Nat, and Ray. I wrote again and this time Raph read it aloud.

"'_Are they okay? Have they left yet?'_" Raph read and then snarled before answering, "The Gruesome-Threesome are still here and those Peds are fine. Why ya want ta know?"

"'_I need to let them know that I cannot join their mating pack. I wouldn't have been able to leave my brothers even if you three hadn't wanted me ever. I've always loved you more than anything and would fight to stay by your sides_,'" Leo read to Raph as I wrote and my new mates smiled happily, "We love you too, Baby."

I thought for a second and scribbled out a new note and showed it to Leo.

"'_What's a Ped?_' Raphael!" my oldest brother snapped as he slapped Raph in the back of the head, "Stop calling them that. _You_ are going to answer Mikey's question."

I looked to Donnie in confusion as Raph and Leo fussed with one another.

"Raph didn't like the fact that Leon and his brothers asked you to be their mate or that they are nearly twice your age and called them a bad name," Donnie explained and I scribbled out a word and showed it to my brother, "Yep. That's the word."

Donnie and Leo laughed as I shook my finger at Raph angrily and wrote another note.

"'_They were just tryin' ta make me feel better_,'" my red-banded brother read, "True, Baby, but they are attracted ta ya and I find that ta be offensive. One, ya are my baby brother. Two, ya are seventeen and they are far from that and ought ta be ashamed of themselves for thinkin' of ya in that way. Three, ya was meant ta be our mate and that means 'hands off.'"

"Damn straight," Leo grunted before we all jumped as the door swung open to reveal Master Splinter, "Father, we were just about to come get you."

"I see," Sensei agreed with sparkling eyes as he came over and gave me a hug, "I am glad to see you awake, my son. How are you feeling?"

I smiled and gave the sign for "okay."

"You seem more than okay, Child," Father calmly said, "I feel a great burden has been lifted from your soul."

Leo and Donnie kissed each of my cheeks as Raph squeezed my shoulders while I beamed happily.

"Ah," Father breathed as he smiled at me, "I see that you have made your decision as to which mating pack you belong with. I admit that I am happy to see this since now I know I won't lose you to the world that the other turtles come from. You leaving the clan would have been a dark day for your family."

"Mikey told us that he wouldn't have ever left," Donnie grinned out, "He belongs here with us."

"Child, I cannot apologize more for knowing that it was my doing that you suffered alone for so long," Master Splinter lamented looking guilty.

I scribbled out a new note and Leo read it as I wrote.

"_I understand your reasoning for your decision. You were trying to protect me, but I am glad that I know the truth now. I thought I would never know love in more than a family way and that hurt a lot. I forgive you, Father._"

"I am glad that you understand, but it does not give you back the months that you felt so alone," Father acknowledged, "Michelangelo, I know what your intentions were when you threw your brother into the water. You were saving Leonardo's and Raphael's mate for them, weren't you? You felt that you were expendable to this family and choose to sacrifice yourself rather than have your brothers suffer the loss of Donatello."

There was no denying Father's words. All I could do was lower my head as my brother's gasped around me.

"_Shell_, no," Raph growled as I was jerked into his arms as Leo and Donnie wrapped themselves around us, "Ya ain't got ta feel that way ever again. Ya are our mate and ya are loved dearly. In our matin' pack we are equals and there ain't no sacrificin' allowed."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Donnie covered my lips with a finger.

"Don't you ever do that again, Mikey," Don instructed, "In battle we will find a way out _together_. Nobody gets left behind, alright?"

I nodded as Leo and Raph hooked there pinky fingers with each of mine and I shook them to show that I promised.

"The only problem you will have is not being able to chatter for a bit of time like you usually do, Michelangelo." Sensei laughed, "I'm sure there is much the four of you will need to discuss, but I think it is high time for you to eat."

Father left to get me some soup and I snuggled back into my mates' arms. I saw Ray peek in and I beamed at him.

"Ya awake, Kid," Ray greeted making my mates turn and glare, "Ah. Not welcome?"

"Our _mate_ needs to be kept calm and shouldn't have too many visitors," Donnie declared before jumping in surprise when Ray burst into laughter.

"Mate, huh?" the older turtle chuckled as he turned to my elder brothers, "It's about time. Took ya three long enough."

I scribbled out a note and showed it to Ray.

"'_That's what I said_,'" Ray read aloud as my brothers grinned at me and began to relax with the other turtle, "Well ya make sure they treat ya right."

"There is no question about that. We will make sure our mate never suffers alone ever again. You be sure to tell Leon this," Leo agreed as I nodded at Ray.

"Leon is goin' ta be heartbroken," Ray smiled out and nodded at all of us as he excused himself.

I scribbled out a new note and held it up.

"'_See. Ray is nice and so are his brothers_,'" Donnie recited, "Okay. I will try to be nicer since it does seem like Ray was very happy for us."

"He ain't too bad," Raph grudgingly agreed, "It's that Fearless-wannabe I want ta snap in half. Touchin' ya like he did that first night. Still think he's a Ped."

I rolled my eyes as Leo and Donnie face-palmed. Father returned with my soup and I was fed and fell back to sleep curled with my mates.

"Thank you, God," I thought to myself as I was pulled closer to Raph's plastron even as Leo and Donnie snuggled against my back, "Thank you for allowing me to feel as loved as I do in this moment."

I was treated like royalty by my new mates over the next few days as I healed and strengthened. My throat healed up quickly, but my lungs and feet were going to take longer. Donnie had constructed a mobile cart with oxygen because I had to keep the breathing tube strapped to my face. I could speak, but only in short words or phrases due to getting winded and I couldn't walk on my feet at all. I was a little saddened when Raph carried me out to the living room, wrapped in a blanket, so I could say goodbye to the other brothers.

"Don't hit his feet," Donnie warned as pillows were arranged for me to lean against and Leo propped my bandaged feet up on a padded footstool as gently as possible, "Everyone be gentle with any touching. Mikey is still healing."

"I'm going to miss you, Little One," Leon informed me as he leaned down and gave me a hug once I was settled.

"Miss too," I agreed as my mates frowned at the older turtle and Raph began to growl low in his throat, "Let go. Mates…no like. Sorry."

"Keep holdin' on ta my youngest mate and I'll introduce ya ta my sais," Raph threatened.

Nat grabbed Leon by his shell and jerked him back with a grin even as I turned a glare on an innocently, whistling Raphael.

"You take care of yourself, Mikey," Nat smiled out as he shook my hand, "Keep your mates on their toes. Us youngest brothers have a very important job to keep older brothers in line."

"Kay," I nodded, "Care for Ray…Leon."

"Always," Nat agreed as he squeezed my hand gently, "Get better soon."

Ray walked up behind Nat and I felt a lump develop in my throat. Ray was the one that I would miss the most.

"Goin' ta miss ya, Kid," Ray admitted as he kneeled down before me, "Ya made me remember how ta relax a little. I won't lie and say that I hadn't hoped that ya would have accepted our offer…."

This time Leo's growling interrupting Ray and I looked over my shoulder and shook my finger at him as Ray, Leon, and Nat chuckled.

"Calm yaself, Leo," Ray instructed with a smirk, "What I was goin' ta say was I had hoped ya would accept our offer, but I hoped more that your brothers would do tha right thin' by ya. I could tell that ya loved Leo, Raph, and Donnie very much. Ya belong with them, Kiddo. Me and my brothers would only have been poor substitutes."

My mates relaxed and offered Ray an appreciative smile as my eyes filled with tears and I nodded.

"Three great…but not mates," I tried to explain before looking to Donnie feeling bad about not being able to explain myself better.

"Are you trying to say that Leon, Ray, and Nat are great turtles, but weren't meant to be your mates?" Donnie asked as he kneeled beside me and I nodded my head as the other turtles smiled

"Miss you," I offered as I hugged Ray around his neck, "Honorary…big brother."

Ray beamed and stood as Raph sat beside me and I cuddled into him as I swiped at the tears on my cheeks.

"I okay," I assured my mates as Leo and Donnie hovered near Raph and I anxiously.

"How does a dick like you get to be an 'honorary big brother,' Ray?" Leon pouted before turning to me, "What about me, Little One?"

I laughed silently at his pitiful expression as I cuddled against Raph. I had realized a couple of days earlier that Leon might have been coming on to me from the first moment we met and now I understood why my mates were not too happy with the older turtle.

"It is a majority voting system," Donnie drily said as he narrowed his eyes, "You were outvoted. Ray was the champ with Nat following closely behind. Sorry, Leon, majority rules."

I was surprised when the three brothers burst into laughter as Leon shrugged with good nature.

"Have a great trip. Bye," Raph dismissed as he patted my back as I lightly coughed at using my voice too much with my healing lungs.

"Be nice," I warned.

"This was an experience meeting you guys," Leo admitted, "Fighting beside you was an honor and I guess without your intervention our youngest mate would still be alone and in pain. Thank you for being the catalyst to completing our mating pack."

Leo offered his hand to Leon which the older doppelganger shook, but then my older brother jerked Leon forward.

"I have a feeling we might meet again another time," Leo smirked out before frowning, "At that time you better keep your hands to yourself, Leon. Never touch Mikey or any of my other mates again or I will end your existence as slowly and painfully as possible starting with what is between your legs. You have a good journey now."

Raph guffawed as Donnie and I looked at Leo in awe as he calmly sat down beside me. Leo could be _scary_. Leon shuddered and nodded as he backed up behind a snickering Ray. Donnie picked up a box and handed it to Nat.

"I have reconfigured the weapon we took from Shredder," Donnie explained as the older turtles listened, "This device can now purify water and air. Once you get your world cleaned up then you can start rebuilding your resources. Come back to this dimension and gather some seeds and reintroduce some of the common animals. I would suggest starting with chickens. The world is not a world without pizza and eggs."

"My God," Nat breathed as he cradled the box, "Donnie, you don't know what this will mean to our world. Thank you!"

"You have our deepest gratitude," Leon gasped as Ray wiped at his tearing eyes.

"Good," I sighed feeling better about the fate of our "cousins" once they returned home, "Make world…better. Be safe."

"May your days be calmer and full of peace," Master Splinter interjected nodding as the older, turtles bowed low to him, "Be well."

I waved as Leon, Ray, and Nat left the lair to reach the surface where they could activate their inter-dimensional transporter and return home. I coughed some more and felt weak as I leaned against Raph.

"Goin' ta miss them, Baby?" Raph asked as he lifted me from the couch while Donnie rolled the oxygen cart behind us.

"Little," I answered as Leo followed us up the steps, "Happy…here."

"You're happy you're still here with us?" Leo deciphered as Raph laid me on our bed and I nodded, "We are too, Baby."

Donnie covered me up and crawled up to lay beside me. My mates had torn down the wall between Donnie and Leo's room and had pushed two beds flush against one another. Now we all slept in the same bed together and it was glorious. I had been informed that there would be no physical loving until I was eighteen, but cuddling was really all I could do at the moment anyway.

"Ya sleepy, Babe?" Raph asked as Donnie yawned.

"You and Leo and your terms of endearment. Mikey has always been our 'Baby,' but how did I become your 'Babe?'" Donnie huffed before giggling as Leo nuzzled his temple, "I stayed up for half the night testing that device. I'm worn."

"Too," I nodded as I snuggled against Donnie and shivered, "Cold."

Raph and Leo frowned and I found myself under another blanket with Leo pressed up against my back and Raph against Donnie's. I sleepily grinned as I purred contentedly. I wasn't alone anymore and the pain in my chest was finally gone.

"Happy," I whispered and smiled as three sets of hands squeezed me gently back, "Love you. Love much."

My eyes closed to my mates' whispered words of love.

To be continued with the epilogue…


	9. Epilogue

Wanting to be Wanted

This is an AU/Tcest story. Interested then read. Not your cup of tea. I can totally respect that, but pass my story by and don't get all preachy. To each their own.

I own nothing. Dammit to hell!

Epilogue:

My mates and I settled into our new relationship and each day I discovered the wonders of having mates to rely upon. My lungs and feet got better with time. I could breathe with no difficulties now and there was only one burn that had left a small scar on my heel. It had been good to be able to move around on my own despite enjoying feeling Raph or Leo carrying me when my feet were still tender. My brothers were true to their word and shared all of the plans that they had made with how they were going to court me and show me their feelings and I loved every idea dearly.

I eagerly awaited my birthday and finally the day came when I turned eighteen. I was given cake, balloons, and presents. It was a great day, but that evening my brothers showed me how much they cared with a very special present that left me breathless. I moaned into Raph's mouth as Leo thrust into me from behind and Donnie continued his skills between my legs.

"Good, Baby?" Raph asked as he pulled back while I panted at what was occurring and cried out with pleasure.

"_Uhn_…good," I groaned, "Yes…good."

I arched when Donnie sucked me into completion and then all I could do was hold on as Leo continued to pound into me before he spilled his seed deep within me. I went limp and felt myself eased down on the bed.

"Best…birthday…_ever_," I gasped as I panted and my mates chuckled around me.

"Ain't over yet," Raph smirked out, "My turn next. I still don't understand how Leo got ta be tha one that took ya virginity."

"Oldest mate's right," Leo grinned out before he leaned down and kissed me deeply, "Plus, you had your way with Donnie first. Now we are even."

"That was a night to remember," Donnie laughed as I watched Raph eyeing me hungrily, "Leo, I want some action too."

"You've got it, Babe," Leo assured as he crawled atop Donnie.

I giggled when Raph glomped me and I arched when he slid easily into my already wet entrance as I watched his face shift into a look of pleasure.

"Now I'll show ya a real good time," Raph growled as his hips went to work even as I heard Donnie beginning to moan loudly, "Let's see who can outlast who, Fearless."

My cries joined Donnie's as we both were rocked into until our eyes were rolling back in our sockets. This was heaven. This was what I had been yearning for and it was more than I ever thought possible.

"Love ya, Baby," Raph gritted out as he pounded me good and hard.

"Love you too," I groaned and looked over as Donnie screamed loudly when Leo finished their love making, "We win."

Raph laughed as he continued to work me into a tizzy. My heart beat fast and I never felt more alive as Raph sprayed inside of me. We collapsed against Donnie and Leo and I reached and held my mates' hands even as they twined around me.

"Thank you for loving me," I whispered to my mates, "I so wanted to be wanted by you. I love you three so much."

"And we will never give you up because we want and love you too," Donnie insisted as he leaned down and showed me what a toe-curling kiss felt like while Leo and Raph smiled at us and whispered their own words of love to Donnie and I, "Rest, Baby, because it's _my_ turn next."

I giggled joyfully and lavished in my mates' attentions. Finally, I had my heart's desire and for me everything was right again. I was exactly where I had always wanted to be with my world revolving around my mating pack. This was happiness.

The end.

This has been fun. I will have a new story coming out called "A Tale of Four Brothers." As Raph would say, "If ya liked this story about my bros and I, then check out tha new tale. I've got tha starrin' role and I think ya might just enjoy readin' about yours truly."

TTFN,

Turtle Babe


End file.
